A MarySue lands in Patch Village
by Rose-Oracle
Summary: One random day, a Mary-Sue lands in Patch Village. Rating may be changed, more info inside. This story should not be taken seriously. COMPLETED!
1. Meet Miss MarySue!

Rose: Hello, all! This story is from the "Give a Review, kill a Sue" foundation, which was not started by me. For every review you send, you will recieve a description of the Mary-Sue you helped put down.

Horo: This story should also not be taken seriously. HOW DO YOU TAKE A STORY SERIOUSLY? (has a fit)

Rose: (sweatdrops) Uh, yeah. Yoh, while Horo is having a fit, could you do the disclaimer?

Yoh: (yawns) Sure. Disclaimer: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. She does, however, own a black and gold witch hat.

Horo: Where'd that thing go, anyway?

Rose: Probably somewhere in my closet of dark doom.

Horo and Yoh: (twitch and sweatdrop)

Rose: ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

It was a normal day in Patch Village. Yoh and friends had just finished watching a random Shaman Fight, and now they were chilling in the shade. Suddenly, a bright beam of light appeared in the sky, and a figure started falling from the sky!

"Whoa!" gasped Horo, "It's a person!"

They all jumped to their feet and raced to the spot where the light had come from.

* * *

By the time they had reached the cliff, the X-Laws and Hao's group were already at the scene, all murmuring at the figure on the ground...

It was a girl. A girl with hair the color of spun gold, perfect rosy cheeks, and dainty manicured nails. Her outfit was pink and black and tight against her perfect, soft skin. Yoh approached her carefully. "Hello? Are you all right?"

The girl's eyes opened slowly to reveal a pair of dazzling dark purple eyes. Her perfect pink lips split in a sweet smile. "Hi Yoh!" She sat up. "My name is Tenshi Sazano Lila Autumn GlitterBlossom."

Even though Hao could read minds, he didn't need to in order to know that everyone was thinking the same thing he was: _What kind of parents would be in their right mind to name this girl..._that? Tenshi ignored everyone's looks. "My parents died when I was a baby, and they left me fifty bajillion spirits to control. While I roamed the world alone, I found that many people fell in love with me, but alas; I have been cursed with the kiss of death. Everyone who fell in love with me perished!" She whimpered, wiping a few tears away befor continuing. "I found a few people who were able to help me get into the tournament so that I could avenge my parents and-" She gasped and squealed before launching herself at Tao Ren, screaming "Tao-Tao!"

Ren twitched. "Tao-Tao...?"

Tenshi squeezed him and prattled on. "When I registered for the tournament, I met you, Ren Tao, and you told me that I was more beautiful than a lotus flower." She blushed and giggled.

Ren twitched again. "That never happened! Who the Hell are you?"

Tenshi ignored him. "We became separated by fate, but now we are together again! We will fall in love and start dating, and you make me your Shaman Queen, but then I am kidnapped by Hao out of jealousy."

Hao's eyes grew wide. _'There's no way...is she really...?'_

"While I am with Hao, I start to fall in love with him also, but then I find out that he killed my parents. So now I hate him, but I love him too, and I still love Ren, but then the X-Laws kidnap me from being kidnapped, and I fall in love with Lyserg."

Lyserg let out a noise that was a mix between a cough and a choking sound. "Wh-what?"

"...but I still love Hao, but I hate him too, but I love Ren, and then you get in a big fight, and I jump in when everyone fires at the same time, and I get hit with all of your attacks at once, but because I'm so pure and beautiful, the Great Spirit revives me, and in the end, Yoh becomes Shaman King, and Ren and I get married, but I cheat on him with Lyserg, but I feel bad, so I throw myself in the ocean, and everyone is sad."

Ren pulled out his Kwan Dao. "That's never going to happen." He drew back his arm and thrust the weapon through Tenshi's stomach.

She giggled. "That tickles! Do it again!"

Ren looked down. His weapon...it had gone straight through her stomach, but there was no blood to speak of. He drew it out slowly, only to see that it was as clean as when he had first polished it. There was no mark on Tenshi's stomach whatsoever. It was like he hadn't even touched her.

_'Like she's...immortal...' _As this thought passed through Ren's mind, he flopped over in a dead faint, face-first into the dirt.

* * *

Yoh: ...This girl scares me.

Horo: I'm not scared!

Rose: Well, she can't get you. Remember: Reviews kill Sues! Make the world a better place!

Yoh: To find out who started the "Give a review, Kill a Sue" foundation, read the Naruto Fanfic "Chronicles of Princess Mary-Sue", which is about a Mary-Sue princess who is captured by the Akatsuki.

Horo: Rose-Sempai did not write that.

Rose: Also, I'm sticking Tenshi with you for a while.

Horo and Yoh: WHAAAAAT? (utter shock)

Rose: Yes, I'm THAT evil. Mwahahahaha!

Yoh: ...Your evil laugh is getting better.

Horo: Have you been hanging around with Hao lately?

Rose: (shifty eyes) Maaaaybeee...


	2. Poor Ren

Rose: Hello all!

Ren: Why am I here?

Lyserg: You're supposed to help introduce this fic. As a reminder, this story should not be taken seriously.

Horo: HOW DO YOU TAKE A STORY SERIOUSLY? (has a fit)

Ren: I thought you were in the breakroom with Yoh!

Horo: Yeah, but I got bored. Plus, Hao came in.

Lyserg: HAO! (enraged)

Rose: Will someone introduce this fic?

Ren: Rose-Sempai does not own this fic. She does, however, own a picture of me that she drew in art class today.

Rose: I wish my art teacher would let me take that home. I'm a Ren fan.

Lyserg: We have gathered that.

Rose: ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

Frowning, Hao paced the slowly smoldering campfire. His troupe had long gone to bed, but this girl had him up and worrying. _'She was actually sent...on purpose? No, that's not possible. I have to ask. This is surely a mistake._' Hao took the Oracle Bell off his wrist and dialed, just like a phone. He waited for a few seconds when a voice asked:

"Who is this?"

Hao gave a sigh of relief. "Did you send her on accident?"

There was a quiet laugh. "Oh no, she's there on purpose."

Hao steamed. "What? Why her?"

There was a sigh. "Hao, this is a trial. She needs to learn, along with the others. No one is going to happy with this, but I'll tell you what: if you do your part of the trial, then I'll try to shorten her visit. Remember Hao: this is a trial." There was a click, and Hao sighed. He re-fixed the Oracle Bell on his wrist and re-lit the fire. Fire always made him feel better.

* * *

Lyserg bit his nails. "What's up with that girl, Tenshi? What's her connection with Hao? Why is she so ANNOYING?" Lyserg punched the ground and drew back with a shout, nursing his injured hand.

Lady Jeanne had felt Tenshi's presence in Patch Village, even though she had not heard the girl's little speech. "She's going to be quite the problem." the X-Laws leader murmured.

* * *

Ren rolled over in bed. "Hnn..." He was having an excellent dream, one where that annoying girl Tenshi what's-her-face didn't exist, and where he was well onto his way to becoming the Shaman King.

"Tao-Tao!"

The sound of dainty feet pattering delicately on the floor grew louder and louder until there was a 'Whump!' on Ren's bed. Said Chinese Shaman twitched.

Tenshi was sitting on him. Unfortunately, she did exist.

"So, how do you feel about Mrs. Tenshi Tao, or Tao Tenshi, Tao Ren Tenshi, Mrs. Tenshi Ren Tao-"

Ren threw Tenshi off him. "Out!"

With a whimper, Tenshi hung on Ren's arm. "But Tao-Tao..."

"No! No more Tao-Tao! Don't call me Tao-Tao!"

However, that didn't deter Tenshi. Squealing, she hugged him. "KYAAAH! Rennie, you're so cute!"

She squeezed him, and Ren started choking. "Can't...breathe..."

He kicked at the air until Tenshi let him go after squeezing him for about five minutes. Ren pushed her out of his room. "Out. I need to change." While he pulled on his red chinese shirt, Ren made a mental note to talk to the Patch Officials about "it". '_She can't be in the Shaman Fight...she's too weak, and she doesn't even have a team...she can't be fighting...'_

From the view of the S.o.F. (Rose: Fan-ese for the Spirit of Fire.), Hao watched Tenshi glomp, squeeze, and harass Ren. '_Her trial grows deeper the longer she continues to stay here.' _The pyro shaman thought.

* * *

Ren tried to keep his composure as he went down to breakfast, but it's hard to do that when you have a blonde-haired girl with the attention span of a squirrel clinging to your arm. People stared, but one killing glance from the Tao was enough to silence them.

Giggling, Tenshi continued to squeeze Ren." You're so cute, Rennie!"

Just when Ren thought he was going to run out of air, Tenshi suddenly launched herself at Lyserg, screaming "Lys-kun!", and proceeded to squeeze the life out of him, just like she was doing to Ren earlier this morning.

Lyserg's emerald eyes grew to the size of dinner plates as Tenshi slowly began constricting the air out of his lungs.

Ren scurried to an empty seat between Yoh and Horo, silently apologizing to Lyserg about saddling the Dowser with his "problem".

"Dude, that girl is killing you!" Horo marveled. "How much are you _hurting?"_

Ren rolled his eyes, reaching for a piece of toast. "I am a Tao, and a little fangirl is not hardly enough to damage a Tao." But Ren was lying through his teeth, for every breath he took was a blow of pain to his slowly recovering ribs and lungs. Little fangirls weren't enough to damage a Tao, but Mary-Sues were.

* * *

Lyserg: ...Those are some pretty deep ending words there, Rose.

Rose: I thank my English teacher.

Horo: Next time: What will happen to Tenshi? What will happen to Ren? Who has Hao made a deal with? What are Tenshi's "special powers"?

Ren: Will Horo ever shut his mouth and go back to the breakroom?

Rose: Remember: Reviews help kill Sues!


	3. Tenshi's on the warpath!

Rose: Wow, we already have two Sues down! This fic is on a roll!

Hao: You go, girl!

Rose: (sweatdrops) Hao, don't do that.

Hao: Right. A-HEM! Disclaimer: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. She does, however, own a lot of eco-friendly paper.

Rose: Some of you may have noticed that the disclaimer for the last chapter said that I do not own this fic. I OWN IT! What Lyserg was trying to say back there was that I do not own Shaman King. And I don't.

Hao: How did you get them all in the breakroom without one of them coming out to demolish me?

Rose: I gave Yoh a bag of oranges, I gave Ren a bag of peaches, Horo was already sleeping, and Lyserg is up in the library.

Hao: O.O He's not in the breakroom?

Rose: He's too engrossed in a book to care. ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

After breakfast, Ren quickly dismissed himself from the table and started jogging around Patch Village in search of a Shaman Fight official. He stopped to rest in a clearing with a pretty pond surrounded with little red and blue flowers. The pond was a reasonable size, and Ren _was _hot and tired, so he took off his shirt and slid into the water. The water was cool, and Ren felt completely refreshed. Suddenly, a loud yet beautiful voice broke the even more beautiful silence the Tao was enjoying...

"RE-EN! Cursing in Chinese, Ren grabbed his shirt and went underwater as fast as he could. Good thing he did, because Tenshi came into the clearing, her perfectly set golden hair bouncing up and down, her feet springing off the ground as if she was walking on air. Two small, pink, fuzzy spirits followed her, chirping adorably.

"RE-EN, where are youuu?" Tenshi sang angelically, her stunning purple eyes scanning the clearing. She turned to the little pink familiars. "Are you sure he's here, Rin-Rin and Yoki?" The spirits nodded, chirping.

Tenshi flounced over to the pond and peered in the water. She thought about going in, but then remembered that her makeup would run, and she wouldn't look her best for Ren. Tenshi got up, daintily brushed away some imaginary dust, and continued to flounce off, calling out Ren's name.

Slowly, bubbles began popping up from the depths of the pond, and Ren slowly emerged. His saffron eyes followed the extra bubbles, and he crossed his fingers and said a Chinese prayer. He wished it would be anyone...anyone but Tenshi. He wouldn't mind if it was Hao!

There was a 'blurb', and up popped said pyro. "I agree. She has got to go."

Ren's eyes widened. "Y-you..KISAM-" Hao slapped a hand over Ren's mouth.

"Shush. You don't want her to hear, do you?" He looked around as if Tenshi would pop up right behind them.

Ren nodded, and Hao withdrew his hand. "Okay, I know you don't like me, and that's just fine. I can't care about it any less than I already do, but this time, we have to set that aside because of her."

Hao jerked his thumb in the direction that Tenshi had flounced off. "I've had a conversation with the person who sent Tenshi here, and if I can help with her trial, she can possibly leave earlier. That's where you come in."

Ren crossed his arms. "You want me to be nice to her? Forget it."

Hao waved his hands. "No, actually the way you're behaving to the whole situation is perfect. I just need you to maintain that attitude."

Ren blinked. This was unusual, but not impossible. "Alright, I'll do it. But for a price."

Hao groaned. "What is it?"

Ren pondered it for a while. "Hmm... don't bug us for two whole weeks, and...a bag of peaches." (Rose: Ren loves peaches. I'm going to exaggerate that throughout the fic.)

Hao shook his hand. "Deal."

Ren heaved himself out of the water. "So, is there a category that this..._thing _goes into? It's certainly not human."

He expected a snarky remark from Hao, but instead, Hao replied gravely: "Oh yes. Tenshi is a Mary-Sue, a so-called "perfect" character."

Ren raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean, "so-called"?"

Hao sighed and wrung out his hair. "Mary-Sues are created with the perfect girl in mind. They are pure, strong, beautiful, have a tragic past, and are in love with a certain character, yet they all amount to the same thing: a _pest."_

Ren blinked. "You mean...there are _more_?" Now he was horrified. One Tenshi was bad enough, he didn't think he could handle two, or possibly more!

Hao winced. "Yes, there are more. I have come in contact with many of them throughout my travels. I just never thought that one would be sent in the Shaman Fight."

Ren shrugged. "Why don't you just burn her with the S.o.F.?"

Hao ran his fingers through his hair. "Can't. Although Mary-Sues like to embellish, what they say about their past is pretty true. She is a shaman, and a darn powerful one, too."

Ren stood up. "So you _did _kill her parents!"

Hao looked shocked. "Ren, let's get one thing straight: I _never, ever, ever, _kill the parents of a baby, even if they are humans. I know what it's like to be orphaned. Besides, she's about the age that Yoh is now, so that means I was only a baby when her parents died as well."

Ren relaxed. "So, what's her furiyoku level?"

Hao unstrapped his Oracle Bell and tapped it a few times. "It's at...900,150. And growing steadily." Sighing, he re-strapped it to his wrist. "Well, I'm coming back with you to The Patch Cafe. It's just as well, seeing as Tenshi is on the warpath. Oh, and watch out for the rest of her team: They're Mary-Sues in training. Not as much of a tragic past, but still poweful and annoying."

Hao's face then split into a wide, triumphant grin. "But we have some advantages: Mary-Sues are stupid, vain, and use up furiyoku easily. They are also quite childish. Sleep in someone else's room tonight, and watch what happens in the morning. So much fun to watch them throw temper tantrums." Hao cleared his throat and imitated Tenshi's loud, obnoxoius voice: "Where's my Rennie? Where's my Rennie? WAAAAAHH!" Hao laughed and spoke in his usual voice. "I did that once to a rather clingy Sue in America. Screamed so loud, reporters from Europe came to investigate. What spoiled brats."

The two boys left for the Patch Cafe, Hao telling elaborate stories of the Sues he faced, and Ren taking it down mentally for future use.

* * *

Hao: Odd way to end this fic.

Rose: I had a writer's block. They suck. If you guys have any names and/or ideas for the names/actions/looks of Tenshi's teamates and the Team name itself, please let me know.

Lyserg: (comes running down from the library) HAO!

Hao: HWA! Rose, I thought you said Lyserg was too busy reading!

Rose: (drags a struggling Lyserg back to the breakroom) I tied him to a chair. Yay chair.

Hao: Reviews help kill Sues so I don't have to face them all!


	4. Hao has some explaining to do

Rose: I love this chapter.

Yoh: Why?

Rose: This is a flashback chapter! Although it is pretty sad...

Lyserg: Disclaimer: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. She does, however, own a fake samurai sword that's been drawn on with a red marker.

Yoh: Drawn on with a red marker?

Rose: For an English project.

Yoh: Mmkay.

Lyserg: Sue death toll count: 3

Rose: Reviews kill Sues! ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

All eyes were on the pair that had just walked into the Patch Cafe. It was silent. You could've heard a pin drop. The tension in the room was so thick you could cut it with Ren's Kwan Dao.

That was because said Chinese Shaman was walking side-by-side with Asakura Hao.

And the whole Cafe went berserk.

"REN!" screamed Horo, "You betrayed us!" He watched Ren pull out a chair for Hao. "No, not really." Hao said rather nonchalantly.

"We've made a deal." said Ren. "He's going to help us get rid of it."

Everyone looked puzzled. "What do you mean, 'it'?" Yoh asked. Anna didn't look as confused. "I'll bite. It's Tenshi, isn't it?"

Hao nodded gravely. "Yes. Tenshi is a MarySue."

Anna sighed. "That was my first guess. My second was that she's a spy, and everything was just cooked up by an unknown organization."

"I would've gladly gone for the latter." Hao reached for a bread roll, but Anna slapped away his hand. "Ouch!"

"First, you tell us how you know about them. Then you can eat." And, as an extra precaution, Anna moved the bread basket away from Hao.

With a rejected sigh, Hao began his story...

* * *

**Flashback begins (Hao is 13 yrs old)**

"HAAAAAAAOOO! Where are yoooouuu?!" Panting, the Shaman rounded the corner and ducked into a nearby alleyway. The girl chasing him, or Kiri Kasame SummerPetal, was no doubt right on his trail.

Kiri was tall, with long, black hair with light pink streaks in it, and pastel pink eyes. With her was the spirit of a warrior-princess who had died in some unknown battle. Her parents had abandoned her, and Hao had rescued her from almost being drowned in a river.

Or so she thought.

When Hao had denied ever seeing her, Kiri wailed and darted after him. Hao had to admit, she was strong, beautiful, and pure, but she was just so...so...

_Annoying._

The fire shaman wiped his forehead and started looking around for an escape route. A few trash cans, a pile of brick and concrete, and a rusty old ladder. His options didn't look so good.

Dainty footsteps came closer and closer. "Hao, I know you're here. Please, let me be your Shaman Bride!"

Frantic, Hao looked around wildly for some other way of escape. The ladder was rusty, but he could chance it.

Hao ran over to it, grabbed it, and started to climb. He felt it crumble under his weight, and the screws gave way. Below him, Kiri waited for his fall with outstretched arms. Hao closed his eyes and waited for it...but it never came. Instead, he was standing on his feet, and Kiri was no longer screaming for him.

Hao opened up his eyes, and found himself standing on the roof he had tried to escape onto. Kiri was gone in a puff of gray smoke, and behind him was a tall, red-haired guy about his age holding a huge, shiny blue gun that looked almost fake.

"Whew! Hope you're okay, kid. Looks like you don't have much experience fighting Mary-Sues."

Hao blinked. "Mary...Sues...?"

The guy nodded. "Yeah. They're supposed to be perfect little angels, but they cause many characters great distress, like yourself. Worst part of it is, people create them, and there's always two or more of them chasing a character. Come on, I'll explain it to you and introduce you to my boss. By the way, what's your name? I'm Sagittarius."

* * *

Sagittarius had taken Hao into a room filled with shiny, blinking computers and the low murmur of conversation. "Everyone," he announced, "this is Hao!"

Everyone turned to them and greeted the pair with smiles and cheers.

"We heard you helped Sagi defeat a Sue!"

"Was that your first time?"

"Are you hungry at all?"

Hao blinked. "Um, in order: Sagittarius did all the work, what's a Sue? and yes, a little."

Sagittarius laughed. "Hao, just call me Sagi. Lunch is in the breakroom."

The two boys had a peaceful lunch in the breakroom, until Sagi brought up the reason for all of this madness. "Sues are created only for the purpose of love. They are made pure, strong, beautiful, and tragic. And annoying, stupid, vain, and childish. First order of business is the rules: Don't provoke a Sue. They might not like it, but at the same time, they might like it. They're just big mood swings, those Sues. Too unpredictable."

"Second rule is: Don't fight a Sue on your own. Get someone from the organization to help you. If you see a Sue, contact us." Sagi slid a piece of paper over to Hao. "She will immediately be put on mark for a trial. DO NOT create a Sue, or we will have to hunt you down."

"ZERP!" Hao coughed and almost spit out his sandwich. He hadn't created a Sue, but hunting them down... "You're really extreme about this."

Sagi sighed. "Only because a Sue stole my little sister's fiance. My sis was so heartbroken that she drowned herself. I fight for her." Sagi took a picture out of his pocket and slid it over to Hao. He turned it around. "Is this your sister?" Sagi nodded. "She's beautiful!"

Sagi ran his fingers through his hair. "Yes, but not beautiful enough to match a Sue. They damage relationships and break families apart." Sagi pointed over to a girl with brown hair. "See her? One of her sisters created a Sue that stole her father away from her mother. Instant crash."

Hao looked down at his lunch. He wasn't hungry anymore.

* * *

"And...that's it." Hao sat back in his chair. "That's my knowledge of Sues....what are you staring at?"

The group looked terrified. Horo was rigid, Ren was petrified, Yoh was shaking, Choco looked like doom, and Manta was freaking out. Only Anna was the one who was somewhat calm.

"We're screwed, that's what." said Horo, as he passed the bread basket over to Hao.

"Hmm...well, we'll just have to start training more. And keep our eyes peeled." said Anna.

* * *

Rose: ACHOO!

Lyserg: Gesundheit.

Yoh: Funga Fufu. (eats orange) Oranges are high in citrus. They're good to eat when you have a cold.

Rose: That's nice Yoh, but I don't have any oranges.

Lyserg: Again, reviews kill Sues.

Yoh: For every review you send, you will receive a description of the Sue you killed. It doesn't matter if the review is short or long, you just need to review.

Rose: Also, if you review, but do NOT have a account, I can't send it to you. Sorry, but that's how it goes.

Lyserg: That's the way the cookie crumbles.

Yoh: That's how we roll.

All: Ja ne!


	5. Sagittarius makes his entrance

Rose: You guys are fast with the Sue killing! Keep it going!

Ren: Sue death toll count: 6

Horo: You guys are pros at Sue destruction! Disclaimer: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. She does, however, own a Yoh costume.

Rose: And I'm wearing it right now.

Ren: A Yoh costume...?

Rose: It's for Halloween. ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

As night began to fall on the Patch Village, Ren was feeling rather pleased. Tenshi was nowhere in sight, and he was presently polishing off his third bottle of milk. (Rose: I'm going to stress Ren's likes and dislikes throughout this story)

Suddenly, there was a crash outside. Chocolove yelled, and everyone ran to the window.

Outside, there stood a huge green spirit that looked like a tree. Sitting on top of it was Tenshi. Ren's good mood was ruined instantly.

"I hope you guys didn't start without me!" she sang. Instantly, Choco and Horo went into action. They grabbed Ren, pushed him under a bunch of blankets, and sat in front of it, trying to look casual, although their grins probably looked a little manic.

She waltzed up the stairs. "Hello! Hello! Have you seen Rennie?"

Choco looked at Horo. "Ren? I haven't seen him."

Horo tapped his chin. "Ren...Ren...Ren... Oh! I think he went to train. He might be in the forest."

"Okay!" Tenshi smiled, showing rows and rows of immaculately white teeth. "Thanks guys! You're sooo helpful. Bye-bye!"

After Horo and Choco could be one-hundred percent sure she was gone, they took the blankets off Ren.

"She's going to die a very slow, very painful, death." he growled.

"Sorry Ren, but you can't kill her. Only those in the organization can do that."

The tri boys swiveled around to see a red-haired guy about their age with a huge, shiny blue gun that looked almost fake.

"No..." whispered Horo, "Are you..."

"I'm Sagittarius."

* * *

After the rest of the group had been informed that Sagittarius was dropping by, Yoh fetched his twin, who was visibly happy that his old friend was there.

"It's good to see you're well, Hao." Sagi said, "So, what's the progress report on Tenshi?"

Hao sighed. "_Ara, _and I was thinking that you were here to pass her trial."

Sagi shook his head. "Nah, it's too early for that. Only my boss has the authority to pass a trial."

Anna looked like she wanted to punch Sagi for dropping in uninvited, but she also looked like she wanted to beg him for more information. "Hao said you had a sister."

Sighing, Sagi took the picture of his sister out of his pocket. "This is her."

Sagi's sister had long red hair that matched her brother's, and eyes that matched the color of his weapon: blue and shiny. If it wasn't for the small scar on her cheek, the others would've mistaken her for a Sue. Her face was set in a wide smile, and she wore a plain white dress.

Horo sniffled. "She's...so pretty! HWAA! Why do the good die young?"

"Hmph!" said Ren, tossing back his head. "If you were good, wouldn't you be dead now?"

"WHAT DID YOU SAY, POINTY?!" Instantly, they were at each other's throats.

Yoh gently grabbed his friends arms and pulled them into sitting positions on the floor. "Calm down, calm down. It's okay."

Once they had relaxed, Sagi told the tragic story of his sister, and the Sue who had taken her fiance.

* * *

_"My sister and I were close. Even though she was four years my senior, I was taller than her. I called her my little sis."_

_"We came from a close-knit community, so we both knew something was wrong when the Mary-Sue came in. It was clear right away that she didn't come from the inner city. She had come to steal my sister's fiance."_

_"My sister had just gotten engaged when the Sue came. Right away, she started working on stealing him away from my sis. It worked, and their engagement was broken off within the month."_

_"The family was in shock. My sis cried for days on end, and finally, on the day of the wedding, she threw herself in the river."_

_"I too, was in shock. For weeks, I refused to sleep, I refused to eat, and only by my family did I survive. One day, a stranger came to town, and destroyed the Sue in a blink of an eye. The husband disappeared, never to be seen again. Grateful for what the stranger had done, I joined the organization, so other families don't have to feel the pain that I did."_

* * *

When Sagi finished his story, Horo and Choco were crying. Ren was shaking, but no tears. Hao, who already heard the story, had no major reaction to it. Yoh was horrified. Anna looked a tad stunned. "So that's the true power of the Mary-Sue." she said morbidly.

Sagi took the picture and put it back into his pocket. "I'll be sticking around for a while, and give you guys a few pointers on Mary-Sues, should more than one come up. My boss knows."

Anna raised an eyebrow. "Who is your boss, anyway?"

"Uhh...that's classified information. By the way, Hao, remember that first Sue, Kiri?"

Hao nodded, looking fearful. "Yeeeees. What about her?"

"Tenshi's got a new friend, apparently. Kiri's made a comeback."

* * *

Rose: Ooooh, I've left you hanging! I'm a baaaad girl! Mwahahahahaaa!

Ren: O.O No more early Halloween candy for you.

Horo: Kee-ripes, that's a scary cliffhanger.

Rose: Well, it _is _Halloween. It's supposed to be scary!

Horo: A Yoh costume isn't scary (referring to my costume).

Rose: I'm sorry, would you rather have me be Anna? (That was actually my first costume choice.)

Horo & Ren (although Ren, not so much): O.O (twitch and sweatdrop)

Rose: Also, if you have any ideas for the story, let me know. I feel a writer's block coming on...

Ren: Reviews kill Sues.

Horo: Thanks for reading!


	6. Hide and Go Away, part 1

Rose: Sorry I haven't uploaded in a while, but I'm going through a writer's block. This chapter is a bit of a filler, sorry.

Hao: Ehh. Me no like fillers.

Rose: I said a BIT of a filler. And use proper grammar, please?

Hao: English class is going to melt your brain. If not, the S.o.F. will.

Rose: Remember what I called you out here for, Hao?

Hao: Right, right. Disclaimer: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King or the song To the Left. She does, however, own a Christmas List, and a Ren Tao plushie is at the top. Why not me?

Rose: Because Kiki-chan (my friend) would _murder me._Plus, I prefer Ren. I was lucky that Kiki-chan didn't say: "No! He's mine!" So I take what I can. I'm also accepting ideas and suggestions you guys have for the fic. Also, what do you think of Sagittarius? Like him or don't?

Hao: Sue death toll count: 10 Sues down!

Rose: Thanks for reviewing, guys! Keep it up! ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

"NANIII?! You mean Kiri is back?" Sagittarius nodded. "Yes. She's lurking around Patch Village, helping Tenshi. Kiri is also training Tenshi's team."

Hao was in a very spazzed state. The thought of two Sues scared the living daylights out of him, especially since he already had an encounter with Kiri. "So, how did Kiri survive?"

Sagittarius ran a hand through his hair. "She dodged the attack by teleporting. A Sue is at her weakest when she is focused on the guy she likes. She wasn't as focused on you as she was on me and this." He hefted his gun over his shoulder. "This gun has bullets that eats a Mary-Sue from the inside once they're shot with it. They don't disappear in gray smoke like Kiri did. They explode with a bunch of black crap." Everyone snickered when he said that.

Suddenly there was a light 'tump', scaring everyone except Anna. "So, Lyserg, what do you want?" Said greenette was on the windowsill, red-faced and out of breath.

"There's a strange girl running through town. She's yelling your name, Hao, and she almost ran me over." Everyone sweatdropped.

"Then when she saw me, she picked me up and tried to drag me away, saying that I saved her from Hao. What's her game? She acts like Tenshi, but...she's not Tenshi."

Hao spazzed again. "Um, I'm Sagittarius. I'll explain what happened in just a moment." The redhead sweatdropped. _He's got to stop doing that!_

* * *

Once Hao had calmed down a little, Sagittarius told Lyserg about Kiri, Tenshi, and the Sues. Lyserg didn't react beyond asking the occasional question, and when Sagittarius finished, Lyserg stood up.

"Thank-you for the information. I will pass it on to Jeanne-sama right away."

All at once, there was a scream, and the sound of something toppling over. "Where could they be? We've searched, like, everywhere!"

Sagittarius stood up. "Hao, Ren, Lyserg, Yoh, and for good measure, Horo, get out of here and hide somewhere. Chocolove, you and I will have to distract them."

As the selected guys ran, Chocolove turned to Sagittarius. "Why do I stay behind?"

Sagittarius smiled apologetically. "The Sues are less likely to go after you. Sorry about that."

* * *

"Check...Ren, is yours set up?"

"Check...No duh, Kisama."

"Check...I think I hear something. Music?"

"Check...Is Horo tuned in to the radio again?"

"Check...To the left, to the left! Everything you own in the box to the left! In the closet, that's my stuff-"

"Check...BAKANA! You're worse than Choco-baka!"

"Check...Guys, shh. I think I hear someone coming."

Night had fallen over the Patch Village, enveloping it under a blanket of stars. Very few were out at this time, but there were two very determined participants out on a hunt that would last until dawn....

"Hao! Tao-Tao! Lys-kun! Where are you?!" Said participants sat down at the fountain, tired and weary, even though they had only been searching for less than five minutes. Their stunning-no, their divine beauty would've been enough to warm the heart of even the coldest passers-by. But the five hiding in and around a nearby tree were not fooled by their looks. If one were to look past the veils of beauty the girls hid behind, there would not be a kind heart, instead there would be one that was selfish and vain and a rotten soul, not to mention the pure desire to annoy and pester the ones they claimed were their "soul mates". The quote-on-quote "soul mates" were waiting for the pursuers to continue their search so they could get the heck out of there.

As the girls turned to check themselves in the rippling water of the fountain's pool, Ren slowly climbed down the tree.

"What are you doing?" Hao hissed down to him. Seeing as he had the most experience with Sues, Hao thought of himself as the leader of the group.

"Taking my chances." The Tao replied. Quietly, he slid down the tree and dove into a nearby bush with a light rustling sound.

The slightly taller of the girls whipped around, her pink-streaked black hair fluttering. "Did you hear something Tenshi?" Her pastel pink eyes glimmered in the moonlight.

The shorter of the two looked up at her friend, her dark purple eyes shining, offset by her amazing golden hair, which shone under the starlight. "No I didn't, Kiri. Maybe it was just a wind spirit giving you a blessing." She smiled. "After all, those as precious as us deserve such blessings from Seirei-class spirits."

From among the tree leaves, Hao gagged. "Oh, I bet it was. Let's keep looking. The boys would've found us by now and would've swept us off our feet and carried us off." The girls sighed in unison, lost deep in their romantic fantasies.

Ren scoffed. "Like that would ever happen." He rolled his saffron eyes and crouched down.

Seeing his own chance to escape, Yoh ducked down from the tree and hid by the Cafe. When Silva spotted him, the younger Asakura gave off that aura of 'If-You-Say-Something-Wrong-I-Will-Curse-You' like he did in episode 47. (Rose: Seriously, that's what he does in the beginning.) Alarmed a bit, Silva nodded and pretended not to see him.

Hao sighed. He would've mimicked Yoh's actions, but Silva might not be as willing to help him, and would more than likely expose their hiding place. Then Tenshi and Kiri would know, and find them, and probably the others, too.

Suddenly, a pink sprite appeared by Tenshi's ear. It squeaked adorably, and Tenshi gave it a pat on its' head. "Thank-you, Kazzy!" Tenshi turned to Kiri. "Kazzy said..."

The boys held their breath. Was this the end?

"...that there's an adorable pair of boots that are on sale just around the corner!" Kiri squealed. "Oh, I LOOOVE shopping! Let's go!" The two girl skipped off as the boys breathed a sigh of relief. "I thought we were dead meat!" Horo gasped as he slid down the tree trunk. Hao did the same, but jumped off near the bottom, making it seem more professional. "Well being dead meat to me doesn't matter. I would just come back in 500 years." Ren mooshed his foot into Hao's cheek. "Bakana."

* * *

Rose: Yaay! I've come up with a Christmas filler special for you guys. Hao and Yoh get tortured over the holidays by a Holiday Sue!

Hao: (swallows nervously) You're not giving us a break, are you, Rose?

Rose: My teachers aren't giving me a break with my homework... (goes into Emo Corner)

Hao: Only reviews and Ren Tao plushies can cheer up your beloved authoress! Review or be burned by the S.o.F.! Mwahahahahahaaa! (laughs evilly)

Rose: ...I've always been partial to Hao's evil laugh.


	7. Hide and Go Away, part 2

Rose: I swear that I'm cursed by Twilight...

Yoh: Why do you say that?

Rose: My dad thinks that Twilight is too creepy and bloody, but then why does he let me read Harry Potter? Anyway, Twilight premiered at midnight on Thursday, and I woke up at midnight feeling sick.

Yoh: And that sick feeling came back, which is why you went home on Friday. Disclaimer: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. She does, however, own a Team Star shirt. Why?

Rose: I made it during my Hao phase over the summer. Sue death toll count: 12 Sues down.

Yoh: That's about two Sues per chapter. Rose, is there any way you'd reconsider making the Holiday filler special? (puppy eyes)

Rose: Sorry Yoh, but I already promised the readers I'd do it. ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

As Tenshi and Kiri shopped, Yoh, Hao, Horo, Ren, and Lyserg moved from hiding spot to hiding spot, knowing that the girls would be back on their trail at any time. They were powerless, even, seeing as Tenshi and Kiri could recognize their furiyoku patterns from miles away, and could sense their spirits as well, so the boy's spirit allies were back at the inn/hotel/place they were staying at. Ren brought their small group into the clearing where he and Hao first made the deal.

"We might be okay here for a while." the Tao said, glancing around. Horo spazzed, unknowingly mimicking Hao's earlier actions. "_Might _be okay? I want to know for sure that I'll be okay! I want to know that I won't have two crazy strong, yet really gorgeous girls on my trail for at least a few minutes!"

Yoh shook his head. "Ren's right. The longer we stay in the village, and the closer we are, the more likely that Tenshi and Kiri are going to find us. They have to stop shopping soon, and we need to be as prepared as possible." Yoh sat down. "For the time being, we need to rest for when that time comes so we can be ready to run again."

Horo sat down with a grunt. "I'm tired of running! Why don't we just fight them? I mean, even if they are girls, they're annoying! We can take them! Who's with me?!" He stood up, making a dramatic pose.

A loud silence resonated from the group. Crickets chirped and a tumbleweed blew by. Horo sat down, feeling childish.

Ren rolled his eyes. "Bakana. You saw that huge spirit that Tenshi has. Kiri could possibly have the same thing, or worse." Ren bit his nails, trying not to think about it.

Hao flopped down on his back. "Well, I'm not complaining. I've got a pretty good view of the stars out here tonight." He gave a sigh. "It's not so bad."

"I still can't believe they didn't carry any in our size! It's not our fault we have such delicate feet!" The voices, although more melodious than any music box, froze the boy's blood.

"They found us." Hao hissed, "Go, go go!" The boys sprung up and split up in different directions.

* * *

Ren crouched down behind the rock he was hiding. The rock was big enough to hide two people, but it didn't hide him completely.

_If I could just stay within the shadow... _Ren edged himself until he was well-hidden by the rock's shadow. _Perfect!_

"Hao-kuun! Hao-kuun!" Kiri was walking up and down the beach, calling for Hao. She and Tenshi had obviously split up. The rules, it seemed to Ren, were that the guy you found was yours. Finders-Keepers.

"Losers-Weepers." Ren whispered quietly.

Apparently not quiet enough for Kiri's houndlike ears. She whirled around and stared at the rock Ren was hiding behind. Putting her hands on her hips, she called out: "I know you're there! Come out or I'll blast you!" Kiri held up her sword. "Now!"

"What happened to Sugar, Spice, and Everything Nice?" Ren muttered as he planted one foot on the rock. He used his other foot as a support as he launched himself over Kiri, trying to escape.

Kiri latched on to his foot and pulled him down onto the sand. "Tao-sama! I thought I'd never find you! Oh, how can I repay you for rescuing me from my family?"

_Tao-sama...? Oh well, at least it's better than Tao-Tao. _"Um, sorry, but I don't recall that incident." Ren tried to keep his temper down. If he got mad and attacked Kiri, it would be fruitless. She had her spirit ally with her, her shamanic medium, and goodness knows how much furiyoku.

Kiri wailed, although her shrieks sounded more melodious than a normal girl's shrieks. "You don't remember me? You promised that when you became Shaman King, you would come back for me, and I would be your Shaman Bride! You saved me when my family was about to sacrifice me!"

Suddenly a light bulb went off in Ren's head. "Oh, I'm terribly sorry. If you could remember the event in detail, please tell me. I'm sure it would jog my memory." He gave his best "gentleman's smile", and Kiri melted instantly.

"Oh, I accept your apology, of course! Now, my family hated me from the moment I was born because I had so much furiyoku at birth..." As she went on, Ren snuck off, Hao's words ringing in his ears.

_Mary-Sues like to embellish._

* * *

Lyserg was hurriedly dodging Tenshi, hastily covering up his tracks. He had made an earlier mistake of letting Tenshi see him, and now she was following him pretty well.

"Lys-kun, you can't hide from me forever! I _will _find you!" Tenshi called out. Finally, becoming impatient with his "hard-to-get" routine, Tenshi pulled out a pair of hand fans with needles on them. The fans themselves were tied to sashes that were tied to Tenshi's arms. The sashes glimmered and sparkled in the starlight; it was impossible to get the color. "Sorry Lys-kun, but I have to do this." Tenshi called. "I'm not trying to hurt you, I only love you!"

A whirlwind started to rush around the poor British Dowser, and he gave an unheard yelp as the swirling winds picked him up, up, and up. He looked down to see Tenshi calling out apologies to him, her arms outstretched and waiting for his fall.

Suddenly, a warning shot fired in the air. The wind keeping Lyserg up collapsed, and Tenshi ran away, screaming.

Lyserg turned to see the Iron Maiden Jeanne, and Marco, whose gun was smoking slightly. "You saved me!" the greenette gasped.

Jeanne shook her head. "We were merely helping a friend."

* * *

_Why me? Why is it always me? _Hao thought as he raced with his brother. No one was winning, but you definitely didn't want to be the loser in this race, seeing as the penalty was getting the life squeezed out of you by a Mary-Sue. Hao didn't know about Yoh, but the pyro was certain that he, at least, was in big trouble.

Suddenly, Kiri stopped. (Rose: Yes, Kiri is the one chasing them.) "I sense strong spirit control nearby. I must go!" And she raced off, leaving behind a trail of dainty pink sparkles, and leaving the Asakura twins with expressions that could only be described as: Wtf?

Catching their breath, Yoh and Hao rested against a tree.

"So, who do you think set it off?" Yoh tapped his chin. "Five bucks says it's Chocolove."

"And I bet five bucks it's Ren."

"You're on!" The boys shook hands as Sagittarius, Chocolove, and Anna stepped into view. "Hah! I knew it was Chocolove who did spirit control! You owe me five bucks, Hao!" Yoh said.

"Actually, it was me." said Anna, holding up her beads to show Hao's old Shikigami.

Hao blinked. "So, who wins the bet?"

"I do." said Anna, "You each owe me five bucks."

* * *

Yoh: That actually sounds like something Anna would do.

Rose: I looked up the definition of Mary-Sue on Wikipedia, and there's a male counterpart called a Gary-Stu!

Yoh: (bursts out laughing) Hahahahaaa! A Gary-Stu! No one has the name "Stu" anymore! Hahahahaa!

Rose: ....Seriously, look it up. Anyway, reviews kill Sues, as you all know. Now if you'll excuse me, I have four tests to study for. (sulks off)

Yoh: Could you please cheer up Rose with a Ren plushie attached to your review? I think that would be nice. Ja ne! (waves to the audience)


	8. Christmas filler special!

Rose: Welcome to the Christmas filler special! (is wearing a Santa hat while looking for a Ren plushie among all her gifts)

Hao: (is also wearing a Santa hat) Do I really have to do this?

Ren: (is not wearing a Santa hat) Yes, you do. We all have to.

Horo: (wearing reindeer antlers) I hate you. And why are you not wearing a Santa hat? It's only because Rose likes you! FAVORITISM!

Ren: Hey, don't hate me because I'm a bishi. And don't hate Rose for acknowledging that I am.

Yoh: Calm, Ren. You too, Horo. Sue Death Toll count: 15 Sues down.

Lyserg: DISCLAIMER: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. She does, however, own a green belt in karate.

Rose: ON WITH LE FIC! (throws Hao and Yoh into the fic)

* * *

Snow gently drifted to the ground, but hardly any of it stuck. It was just as well, seeing as no one was out to enjoy the snow, everyone was inside, curled up under blankets or shopping in the inner city.

Or, in the case of our heroes, on the train that was zooming to the inner city. A young face was pressed to the train window as it sped to its destination. "Aren't you excited, Hao?"

Hao looked up at his younger brother. "Excited? For what? To see the family that wanted to kill me?" Yoh cringed. "No, I mean to celebrate Christmas!" Hao smiled weakly. "Bah humbug." Yoh laughed and sat next to his brother. "Relax! I mean, if my family wants you to celebrate Christmas with us, they must be forgiving you, little by little. Besides, there will be other shaman kids there. It'll be fun, trust me!"

* * *

The train pulled into the station, people rushing here, there, and everywhere. Yoh and Hao got off the train quickly and started to make their way out of the station. Suddenly, a hand shot out and grabbed Hao's shoulder.

Yoh and Hao whirled around to see a girl with long, silvery-white hair streaked with green and red. Her eyes shimmered gold. "Oh, Hao-sama! Yoh-sama! I can't believe I'm meeting you again!"

Yoh blinked. "Who are you?" The girl erupted into shrieks. "You don't remember me? I am Mistletoe Holiday Angel SnowyBell!"

Hao and Yoh exchanged glances. "Um, yeah, I just forgot...we have stuff...to do." Hao said, scraping the barrel for excuses that sounded legit. He exchanged glances with Yoh, communicating silently.

Yoh nodded. "Yeah! We have stuff to do...waaay over there." Yoh pointed to the other side of the station. "Yup, gotta get that stuff done!" Yoh and Hao started backing away.

"Oh, okay. Bye!" Mistletoe waved. "Catch you later!"

* * *

Once they were out of the station, Hao and Yoh broke into a run. They stopped to catch their breath about a block from the station.

"What do you think?" Yoh asked, panting for air, "Definitely a Sue?"

Hao nodded. "Absolutely positive. But not right now. We have a Christmas party in an hour, and we have to be there on time or else we'll get our heads bitten off."

Yoh gulped loudly. "Really?" Hao rolled his eyes. "No. I was exaggerating."

* * *

Within the hour, Yoh and Hao had changed clothes and were on their way to the party. Hao had exchanged his poncho and his star pants for black dress pants and a white shirt. Yoh had changed into a pair of black slacks and a dark blue shirt. Against Hao's warning, Yoh had kept his headphones on.

"Seriously, do you really need to wear those all the time?" Hao asked his brother as they brushed out their hair. All Hao got in response was a raspberry.

"So, what do you think about that Sue earlier? Kinda weird, don't you think?" Hao scoffed. "Yoh, _all _Sues are weird."

Yoh shook his head. "No, I mean weird that we didn't see any members from the organization." Hao sighed. "Yoh, they don't go out carrying their weapons and wearing their badges all the time. They _do _go undercover, you know."

* * *

Once at the party, Keiko started introducing her sons to everyone, which kind of annoyed Hao. It didn't bother Yoh. His mom did that all the time, he was used to it.

"And there's someone very special I want you to meet." Keiko said, bringing her sons over to a girl standing by the far wall. Yoh and Hao recognized her right away; she was the girl who they met at the train station. The Mary-Sue.

Mistletoe was wearing a stunning black dress pinned at her shoulder. Decorating the pin was a piece of fake holly.

She would've looked perfect to anyone outside the organization, and of course, outside of Yoh & Co.

Hao and Yoh gulped as Mistletoe shot them a dazzling grin. "I'm very glad you could make it. These are my sons, Yoh and Hao." Keiko gently pushed Hao and Yoh closer to Mistletoe.

"It's a pleasure to meet you both." Mistletoe curtsied. Someone called Keiko over to the entrance. "Yoh and Hao, I want you to spend some time with Mistletoe." Keiko whispered, "She's a very lonely girl, and I think it would be good if you became friends." She waved to them. "Be good, okay?" Hao and Yoh waved to Keiko. "Yes. We will." They turned to see Mistletoe right in their faces.

"I think it would be best if I jogged your memory. I was born on Christmas Eve, but my mother died giving birth to me. My father took that as an evil omen, so he treated me like a servant. One winter night, you, Hao-sama, came and taught me Reishi. On my twelfth birthday, I ran away from home. I had only traveled for a few weeks when I came upon you, Yoh-sama. You took me in and treated me like a princess. I didn't stay for very long, I didn't want to be a burden to you. I now have an ice spirit, totally different from your friend Horohoros', and I will cheer you both on in the Shaman Fight until you both need to face off, and one of you dies!" She smiled with that sugar-sweet cheerfulness, a smile that added something else to the sentence: "And I'm going to watch you and enjoy your demise!"

Yoh and Hao exchanged glances. "Um..." This was a really awkward situation. Keiko had said to keep Mistletoe company, but she had no idea who-or what-the girl really was.

Mistletoe looked like she was going to cry. "You don't remember me! How awful!"

Hao shook his head in disbelief. "We didn't say that. How could you have known?"

Mistletoe sighed rather impatiently. "Because I told you I have Reishi! Duh!" She was starting to become more and more like a child throwing a temper tantrum than a Mary-Sue, but no one really knew the difference between, except the long beautiful hair, exotic eyes, and powerful Furiyoku.

Hao took a step back. Sagittarius had said, once upon a time, not to provoke a Sue. Well, Mistletoe was pretty provoked right now. Who knows what could happen?

While Hao tried his brain, Yoh used his body. He ran.

When Hao realized his brother ditched him, he ran too.

Mistletoe gasped. "You can't hide from me!" She dashed after them, her long, silvery-white hair swaying, the red and green streaks shining, and her golden eyes flashing brightly.

* * *

Hao quietly ducked behind a large potted plant. He could understand why Yoh had ran. It was simple: Yoh was more afraid of Mary-Sues than Hao was. Yoh had little experience, but Hao wasn't sure that running was the best answer. If this girl really had Reishi, then hiding was useless.

Hao froze as he heard the footsteps getting closer. A boys' face poked around the plant, down at Hao. His hair was pale blonde, and his eyes were a chocolate brown. "Please don't give away my hiding place." Hao whispered, "I'm Asakura Hao. I'm trying to hide from someone." The boy nodded. "My name's Tricki. I'm in the organization." Tricki held up a badge. "I'm hunting a Mary-Sue here. Sagittarius has told me about you." He sat down next to Hao. "Are you hiding from the Mary-Sue?" Hao nodded and pointed over to Mistletoe. "But don't get her just yet. I want to find my little brother first. He's hiding, too." Tricki tapped his chin. "Here, I'll get her attention, you look for your brother."

Tricki got up and walked over to Mistletoe and drummed up a quick conversation. Hao quickly pulled himself up and slipped through a set of double doors to another room.

* * *

Yoh was weaving his way through the large, fancy crowd. No one suspected him to be a Shaman, but he felt weird wearing such formal clothes, compared to the gowns and tuxedos the people in this room wore. He felt out of place, like a big sore thumb.

Suddenly, he saw someone waving to him at a set of double doors. It was Hao! Yoh quickly made his way over to him, panting. "There are so many people here!" He gasped. "Thanks for finding me." Hao shrugged. "It's fine, but right now, I need you to listen. There's someone from the organization here, and he's going to help us." Hao pointed over to Tricki. "We need to move now." Hao slipped through the doors with Yoh, and back to the Shaman Party. "We need to stay on the move, just like when Tenshi and Kiri were chasing us in Patch Village." Yoh nodded seriously. That was a tough time.

* * *

Hao ducked under a table to see Yoh staring back at him. "Sorry, big bro. This is my hiding place." Hao scowled. "Fine then." He got up and slid himself on a passing dinner cart. The sound of harsh stiletto heels came clacking across the polished tile floor. "Hao?! Yoh?! Where are yooouu?" Yoh shivered under the table, and Hao shrunk back on the dinner cart.

"Hmmm...I don't see them. Better use my Reishi powers!" Hao swallowed, and tried to close out his mind. Yoh's teeth chattered. Suddenly, they heard soft footsteps coming behind Mistletoe. "Don't move." There was a shriek whistle, and neither boy could hear Mistletoe anymore. Yoh crawled out from under the table, and Hao slid off the dinner cart. Mistletoe was gone, and Tricki was holding a smoking gun. "I told you I'm in the organization." He slid the gun into its' holster. "My family was killed by a villain Mary-Sue. I'm with Sagittarius, he's my Sue-hunting partner." Tricki waved to the brothers. "I got to go. Happy Holidays!" He disappeared out the door, and into the snow.

* * *

Rose: I wanted to give it a funny ending... (slightly depressed)

Hao: (holds up Ren plushie) Up for grabs, anyone?

Rose: REN PLUSHIIIEE! (grabs plushie and huggles it)

Lyserg: Well, she's happy.

Yoh: Remember, Reviews kill Sues.

Ren: There's going to be a few other fillers, and a special side story... isn't that right, Rose?

Rose: (still huggling Ren plushie)

Horo: Thanks for reading! Please review! (waves arms to the audience)

All: Happy Holidays!


	9. Plan Bait

Rose: Thanks to all who reviewed the Christmas special. Glad you all liked it.

Horo: Although it really wasn't funny.

Lyserg: Hush you. She's in dream land waiting for her last Christmas present in the mail.

Rose: The Shaman King Japanese dub on DVD! By the way, I didn't get a Ren plushie. I got a Yoh plushie.

Horo: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. She does, however, own a Loony Tunes DVD box set.

Lyserg: Sue Death Toll count: 20 Sues Down.

Rose: ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

All exhausted from running, the group sat near the fountain. They had lured Tenshi and Kiri away from them, but it wouldn't be long. Now they had Anna, Chocolove, and Sagittarius with them, going for strength in numbers. But now Kiri and Tenshi could possibly track the spirit control set off by Anna back to the group. They had to keep moving faster now.

"I can't keep this up..." Lyserg sat down and trailed his hand through the water. "We have to at least stop one of them." He looked at the group. "Any ideas?"

A few minutes passed. Sagittarius stood up. "I have a plan. But it's pretty risky." Everyone started yelling. "Risky?! I don't want a risky plan! I want a safe plan!" Screamed Horo. Ren covered his mouth. "You shush up. I'll take the plan, risk or not." Lyserg stood. "I'll take it, too." Horo sat down and huffed. "I'll take it...but I won't like it."

Sagi grinned. "You don't need to like it. You just need to help me with it. But we're going to need bait." Everyone started yelling again. "Bait?! Now it's bait! I'm not going to be bait!" Horo screamed again. Sagi groaned. "Listen, a Sue is most distracted when she's focused on the guy she likes. Hao, I'll need you for this, seeing as Kiri first liked you. Can you do that?" Hao nodded nervously. "Y-Yeah. I think..."

* * *

Kiri had once again split up with Tenshi, and was now skipping down a dimly lit alleyway, though the sparkles and light she emitted were enough to turn night into day. "Oh boys! Where are yooouu?!" She stopped and looked around. "I might have missed one on my way down here. I'll go back." But as she turned around, she could see Hao, the love of her life, standing there!

She gasped. "Hao! You...you found me!" She smiled in an overly sweet, shy way. Hao kicked himself mentally for doing this. _Was there a better way? _He glanced at the rooftops where Sagi and the others were in position, ready to fire.

* * *

"Careful, don't drop it." Sagi warned as Lyserg helped him set up his weapon. "Now see, Kiri's already had her trial, but then she went and escaped. I have permission from my boss to do this." Sagi aimed at Kiri. "I just hope Hao's doing all right down there."

Lyserg flopped down on his stomach. "I think he'll do fine. Hao's had experience with this before, right?"

Sagi nodded. "Yeah, but I was the one who helped him in the end. Hao is slightly Sue-phobic. But then again, isn't everyone?"

* * *

Kiri stepped forward. "Hao, you really won't believe what's happening to me! I'm being chased by a hunter, and now my true loves are running away from me!" She threw herself into Hao's arms. "But you...you came back for me! I know we're going to be so happy together!" Hao felt the fear rising to his throat, but said nothing.

"I really don't believe that someone would try to hunt you." He said in a strangled voice. "That's just absurd."

Kiri squealed. "Oh thank-you! Thank-you!" She hugged him again. "Now, tell me how pretty I am!" She clung to his arm. _Oh no. _thought Hao, _Here comes the hard part._

* * *

"Curse it!" Hissed Sagi, "I'm not ready yet!" Horo frowned. "There has to be some way we can help him..." Suddenly, a lightbulb appeared over Lyserg's head. "I've got it!" He jumped down into the alley below. "Let her go Hao! She's mine!" The Dowser pointed a finger at Hao, trying to look as angry as possible.

Hao blinked until he noticed Lyserg wink at him. "Lyserg! Who gave you the right to interfere? Step aside!" Kiri gasped. "No, please! Don't fight just for me!" Iridescent tears flowed down her cheeks. "Please, stop this useless fighting!"

Lyserg shook his head. "I'm sorry Kiri, but I can't believe that Hao would have the audacity to steal you away from me! I want revenge!"

Kiri gasped and started crying. "N-no! Revenge has no meaning, it will eat you from the inside-out!" Hao glared at Lyserg. "How dare you make a young maiden cry? She did nothing to you!" Hao was actually enjoying himself immensely. It was fun to argue with Lyserg.

"Well if you hadn't stolen her from me, it would've never come to this!" Hao scoffed. "It's not Kiri's fault that she's irresistible!"

Up on the roof, Sagi was grinning. Lyserg's little improv plan was playing like a full house. Kiri was in full range. He aimed.

"Please stop this!" Kiri got up and separated the two. "I can't take this at all! If you keep this up, my poor heart won't be able to take it, and I'll...I'll throw myself into the lake!"

Sagi figured that was enough, and fired. The huge black bullet came spinning at Kiri and found its' target. Her face twisted into utter horror and she screamed. "NOOOO! NOOO!!" The bullet began to eat her from the inside, and filled her with logic and flaws until she exploded, like Sagi said, with a bunch of black crap. The others jumped off the roof to greet and congratulate them

The black gunk had sprayed Hao and Lyserg, but they easily brushed it off. "Well that was entertaining. Let's go do the same thing to Tenshi." Ren said, eager to regain his dignity, but Sagi shook his head. "Sorry Ren, but Tenshi hasn't had her trial yet. We need to wait." Suddenly, they heard somebody's nearby Oracle Bell go off. Everyone turned. It was Tenshi. "Ooh! Pretty! Hey, my team has a fight tomorrow! This is going to be lots of fun!" Fun for her maybe, but a lifetime of terror for the poor group.

* * *

Lyserg: That was truly a scary ending. Why did you have me argue with Hao over Kiri?

Rose: I thought it would be funny. Oh, and the thing about logic and flaws: a Mary-Sues worst enemies are flaws and logic. Flaws are what make them hideous, and logic defeats their amazing power and energy because it contradicts the laws of physics, nature, and, of course, logic.

Horo: That's some pretty deep thinking.

Rose: I know. Anyway, Happy New Year!

Lyserg: Reviews kill Sues.

Horo : Thanks for reading!

All: Bye!


	10. Tenshi's Team finally fights!

Rose: I'm so happy!

Hao: (puzzled) Why?

Rose: Five words: Shaman King original Japanese Dub.

Hao: Oh! The DVDs finally came in?

Rose: Yup! Sue Death toll count: 22 Sues down.

Hao: Disclaimer: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. She does, however, own a Zero Kiryuu plushie (for those of you who know Vampire Knight).

Rose: ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

Silent doom reigned over the group. Tenshi's team was supposed to fight that day, which put everyone in a sour mood. The extremely humid weather didn't help either.

Hao fanned himself with his hand. "This sucks."

Lyserg sighed. "Agreed."

Three things happened after that:

Horo fell over in his chair, Chocolove screamed, and Ren calmly took a sip of his milk after declaring that the Apocalypse was upon them.

Hao blinked. "What gives? Why did you lose it?"

"Lyserg just agreed with you." Ren gazed at Hao and Lyserg before huffing: "It's because Lyserg hates you. We never would've guessed that he was going to agree with you."

Lyserg nodded. "I see." He paused. "But that's still no reason to freak out!"

Suddenly, a shadow cast over the group. They looked over to the window to see a figure leaning there. She had long, dark blue hair and brown eyes. "Hey everyone! I hope you'll come to see my team fight today! I know that Tenshi would love to see all of you cheering her on! Well, I gotta go. Bye!" She hopped off the window, humming a simple tune.

Everyone sat in stunned silence before Ren spoke up. "No doubt she's one of Tenshi's teammates. I think it would be to our advantage if we went to see the fight."

Anna nodded. "It would be a good time to observe their fighting abilities without actually fighting them. Yoh, your training ends here today."

There was a cheer from Yoh outside, but it was quickly silenced by: "We'll just have you do double training tomorrow."

* * *

Sagittarius tagged along with them as they walked to the arena. "I'm nervous about this. What if Tenshi tries to attack us while she's fighting?" Sagittarius fidgeted.

Hao blew a piece of his hair out of his face with a simple puff of breath. "There is an impenetrable barrier around the arena. Only the Patch officials and the contestants are allowed to pass through it."

"FYI Hao, Tenshi is a contestant." Lyserg said coolly.

Hao frowned. "Yes, but a contestant can't step outside the barrier once they've stepped in. If contestants could step in and out of the barrier any time they wished, that would sort of defeat the purpose."

Anna listened to Lyserg and Hao bicker. "That's true. But still, with Tenshi's powers, she can do just about anything. We'll just have to wait and see."

* * *

The group split up once they reached the arena, Hao branching off to sit with his followers, Lyserg branching off to sit with the X-LAWS. (Rose: Must it be in all caps? Lyserg: Yes, it must.) To avoid confusion, Sagittarius sat with Yoh and the others.

"I'm not even in the tournament!" The Sue-Hunter said in a loud whisper. "I can only see spirits, not control them." Manta nodded in agreement.

Ren was attached firmly to the railing, shaking slightly. He could feel the power in the air, and was pretty sure that the others could feel it, too. Tenshi and her teammates stood in the middle of the arena, one with blue hair (probably the one who had "invited" them to see the match) wearing a long black cloak splashed with silvery-pink fabric paint and tight jeans. Her back was to Ren, but he could see a quiver of arrows on her back and a bow attached to her hip. The other girl had long, silver hair and red eyes. She was facing Ren, and waved to him. Black fishnets crisscrossed her dark red shirt, and was matched with black leggings. Ren could see her spirit, some sort of gargoyle. Her medium was a set of daggers attached to her hip. Ren wondered if they were laced with poison.

Hao had said that the members of Tenshi's team weren't totally Mary-Sues. So why was there such an aura of power in the air?

The other team never stood a chance. All guys, they wore brown leather jackets, brown pants, and black boots. One of them was short, with brown hair. Another was tall, with black hair, and still another was about Hao's height, with blonde hair. Ren said a prayer for them.

Horo came over to stand with him. "You feel that?" Horo blinked and looked over at his purple-haired companion. "That pressure of power in the air?" The Ainu nodded solemly. "Who could miss it? The team against Tenshi is in for it."

Sagittarius closed his eyes. He looked...not agitated, but uneasy. Ren said a prayer for him, just for good measure.

The Patch official stepped out into the ring. "The fight between...Team Sweet Maidens and the Wild Westerns will begin. You all know the rules. You lose if someone steps outside the ring during a fight, or if all members of your team exhaust their oversoul. I expect a clean fight from everyone." The two teams nodded. The official brought his arm up, and brought it down. "Begin!"

The brunette of the Wild Westerns charged at the bluenette on Tenshi's team. She merely smiled and shot an arrow at him, slicing his cheek.

"Ugh!" He knelt on the ground. Ren cautiously peered over the railing. _What was that? Too fast!_

The girl simply smiled. "I am Ananara of the Valley. My spirit is this wind dragon." Ananara held up her bow and arrow. "You can't escape my arrows. You can't even see them!"

Chocolove grinned. "Ananara! Say that ten times fast! Ananara, Ananara..."

Horo and Ren didn't try to stop him. They were too focused on the battle below.

"You'd better say your prayers! This fight'll be over in a snap!" She stepped back and was about to charge at him again, but she was stopped by Tenshi. "That's enough, Ananara. Now it's my turn."

Ananara stepped back and let Tenshi take control. Suddenly, the blacknette of the Wild Westerns charged at Tenshi and caught her with a length of rope.

"You idiot!" Ren hissed between his teeth.

Tenshi smiled. "Nishayako, it's your turn." The white-haired girl smiled and shot a knife at the rope, slicing it in two and cutting off the furiyoku supply. " My name is Nishayako of the Volcano. This is my spirit. Dark Gargoyle." She held up more of her knives, and a black gargoyle appeared by her side. "You'd better give up now and save your skins."

Tenshi politely dismissed her. "Nishayako, it's my turn." Pulling out her hand fans, she summoned her spirit. Out again came that giant tree.

"This is my spirit, Flores." Tenshi started spinning her fans and threw them into the air. "Fleur De Li!"

Hao blinked. "She changes from Spanish to French, and we're in Japan. What...?"

Winds swirled around the arena, and the spirit started blooming. Flower petals enveloped the other team.

"What effect does this attack have? Tickle the opponent to death?" Horo exclaimed. "I was expecting something to blow up the whole arena." Ren deadpanned.

Tenshi jumped from petal to petal on tiptoe until she was a good forty feet into the air. "I'll show you what true power means!" Unsheathing the needles on her fans, she shot blasts of wind at the opponents.

Beautiful, but terrifying. To those with a knowledge of Sues, just terrifying.

Ren gripped the railing, his knuckles turning white. "Those idiots." The dust lifted....

Tenshi's attack had killed the brunette of the Wild Westerns.

Panting slightly, she sat down and put away her fans. "Nishayako, Ananara, I've exhausted much of my furiyoku. Could you finish up for me?"

The other girls nodded. "Oh, absolutely Tenshi! Don't worry, you just rest and leave us to finish!" Nishayako smiled cheerfully.

Lyserg was aghast. _Their teammate just killed someone, and they just pretend like nothing's happened?_

Sagittarius noted the others watching with astonished expressions. "Mary Sues remain cheerful no matter what, unless their object of affection has died."

Nishayako pulled out more of her knives. "You guys don't know what it's like to be us. I had everything I wanted. Money, family, power, beauty....it was all handed to me on a silver platter. When I fell in love, I was rejected horribly. I wandered aimlessly until I met Tenshi and Kiri. They understood me, and groomed me to who I am today!"

_And that is a whiny, angsty little bug. _Ren thought, correct.

Ananara nodded. "I have no memories, only of Tenshi and Kiri. To attack us is to insult us." She pulled out more arrows and aimed.

"Return to the spirit world from whence you came!" Arrows were shot, knives were flung.

All three members lay on the ground, dead.

"Winner: Team Sweet Maidens!"

Some people applauded, but all others were silent until a ringing noise came from Sagittarius' pocket.

He pulled out a pager and pressed a button. "Hello? Yes, I understand. Okay, bye." He hung up. "Let's go catch us some semi-Sues!"

* * *

Rose: I uploaded my first tribute!

Hao: YEAH!

Rose: Tao Ren Tribute-Transformation day. Watch it on YouTube from SasoriSempai!

Hao: And when Sagittarius says "Let's go catch us some semi-Sues", he means Nishayako and Ananara.

Rose: I was going to make this three chapters, but I decided not to. Please review..... (yawns)

Hao: It's nap time for her...Please review and kill the Sues!


	11. Semi Sue Hunting

Rose: (groans) Hi peoples... (slams head on desk)

Horo: What's eating her?

Ren: Well, she's losing subscribers and friends on Youtube, and she's worried that she's next. Sue Death Toll: 26 Sues down.

Rose: We can do better than that, peoples! Come on! (pounds fist)

Horo: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. She does, however, own several drawings of Ren. I don't get what you see in that guy.

Ren: I'm more of a bishie than you are.

Rose: It's a girl thing. ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

"So, we all know the plan, right?" Horo leaned over the table in a shadowy, mob boss sort of way.

Lyserg raised his hand. Horo acknowledged it. "There is no plan."

Sagittarius nodded. "Actually, I have one. Ren, you did practically nothing last time we went Sue-hunting, so this time you get to be the bait." Ren snarled, while Horo snickered. "Not to mention that you sat out last time, too, Horo. Just for that, you get to join us."

Horo groaned. "I hate you."

Lyserg put a hand on Sagittarius' shoulder, which was actually rather difficult, seeing as Sagittarius was a lot taller than he was. "Hate him or not, he's still our only choice."

Sagittarius smiled knowingly. "You just want a chance to help me shoot again, don't you?"

Lyserg sighed. "You know it."

* * *

"Do I really have to do this?"

"Come on, all you have to do is run. You're good at that, right?"

"What is that supposed to mean!?"

"Nothing, but if you're bad at running, you're dead."

Sagittarius sighed as he watched Ren and Horo argue while Lyserg helped him set up his weapon. Hao stood lookout.

"Guys, you did practically nothing last time we went hunting. It's time for you to pitch in." Sagittarius explained as Lyserg hooked up a metal support to the weapon.

Ren pointed at Horo. "If he falls behind, it's not my fault, and I'm not going back-"

"I see them! They're coming!" Hao slid down the tree. "Horo and Ren, shut your yaps and get going." Hao shooed them away as he walked over to Sagittarius. "Do you think they'll be okay? Even if it's only two semi-Sues, their power during the match..."

Sagittarius shook his head. "I doubt that two semi-Sues can hold their ground against two ticked-off Shaman. Semi-Sues are really the true embodiments of a fangirl's wants and wishes. Ren and Horo probably won't even break a sweat."

* * *

Oh, how wrong Sagittarius was.

"REN-KUN! MARRY ME!"

"HORO-KUN! I'LL BE YOUR GIRLFRIEND!"

"This sucks." Ren muttered, jumping over a gopher hole.

Running beside him, Horo panted. "Totally."

Up on the hill, everyone was keeping a far distance from Sagittarius and his weapon.

Ren's gaze drifted from the path in front of him to the others on the hill. "If I beat you up there," he yelled to Horo, "We won't have Chinese food for a week!"

The thought of having something other than Chinese food brightened a spot in Horo's mind. "You're on!" He picked up his pace. Ren, not wanting to lose his own challenge, followed close behind.

That is, until he felt the ground lift up from under his feet. Looking down, Ren saw that Horo was screaming at him, and Bason was wailing for the Young Master to come back.

Looking up was a whole other ballpark. A huge, dark gargoyle was holding Ren tightly but gently by his red shirt. Nishayako was sitting comfortably on the gargoyle, hurling knives at the group on the hill. It was a clever plan: Horo would obviously stop, and Ananara would be able to grab him. They killed two birds with one stone.

"You think you're pretty clever, don't you?" Ren hissed at Nishayako.

She looked down, her red eyes shining. "I'm not clever, I'm brilliant, my adorable Ren-kun."

Right when she said that, time stopped.

Horo smiled widely. "First lesson with Ren: never, _ever _call Ren adorable. Now that girl's in for it."

Grinning, Yoh motioned for Sagittarius to aim his weapon not at Nishayako, but to focus it on Ananara. "Ren's got it."

"HOW _DARE _YOU CALL ME ADORABLE! I'LL SLIT YOUR THROAT!" Ren grabbed his Houraiken and, true to his word, slit Nishayako's throat, causing her to bleed. Not all too surprising, her blood was thick pink glitter dotted with tiny sequined stars.

She gasped. "Nooo! My perfect sparkly life! I was supposed to save Ren's life, then commit suicide because my family didn't want me to marry him, then come back and run away with hi-"

Her sentence was cut short as Ren jabbed his sword through her throat. "Scum of the earth. Let's clean the world a little bit."

Dark gargoyle disintegrated, and Ren landed carefully on the hill. "There. One Sue gone-"

"HELLLPPP MEEEE!!"

"....And one to go." Ren looked over the setting sun at Horo running at top speed away from Ananara, who was chasing after him with open arms.

Lyserg motioned for Ren to step aside. "Sagittarius is letting me shoot this time."

The Sue-hunter blinked. "I am? Really?"

Lyserg ignored him and waited for Horo to pass him. Aiming at Ananara, he fired.

She gasped as the bullet pierced her body. "Nooo! I didn't even have a second fight in the Shaman Tournament! You're so mean! Mean, mean, mea-" Ananara exploded with a bunch of pink sparkly dust before she could finish ranting at Lyserg.

Hao blinked. "I thought they exploded with a bunch of black crap. Sagi, what happened?"

Sagittarius nodded. "Full-fledged Sues do. Semi-Sues don't."

As they were coming down the hill, Sagittarius asked Ren an important question. "Ren, why do you go berserk if a girl calls you adorable?"

Ren blinked. "Oh, it's simple, really. Adorable is for kittens and puppies. I am neither."

* * *

Rose: I'm having a sucky day.

Horo: Why?

Ren: If you were paying attention, someone spoiled Naruto for her.

Rose: Next chapter, JayJayChan, your Anti-Sue will appear! Be on the lookout!

Ren: Reviews kill Sues...

Horo: .....And Ren plushies make Rose happy!


	12. Not a Sue? No way!

Rose: Welcome to JayJayChan's Anti-MarySue chapter!

Lyserg: (blows a noisemaker until his face turns purple)

Hao: Rose went through all this trouble just to get Lyserg to introduce this fic with me!

Rose: Well, this also marks an important milestone for us.

Lyserg (has almost passed out due to lack of oxygen): 30 Sues down!

Hao: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. She does, however, own a can of Pepsi which she really shouldn't be drinking. You know what caffeine does to you! (shakes head)

Rose: Screw that! ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

Yoh and Hao Asakura saw this as a very lucky day for them.

For one, last night's Sue hunting had left them both very tired, so they woke up late.

And second, Anna had let Hao and Yoh spend some brotherly time together by shopping.

It was also a good opportunity to recover from the unbelievable incident of last night.

"I can't believe that Ren goes berserk when he's called cute." Hao muttered as he put a can of whatever into the basket.

"Uh-huh."

"I also can't believe that Anna is letting us spend time together."

"Yep."

Hao sighed. "No Yoh, I am not going to buy you oranges."

Yoh whined. "B-but....Funga Fu Fu!"

Hao rolled his eyes and took the items up to the counter. "Crap...they always overcharge here." He fished around in his pockets for some cash as Yoh clung to his shoulder.

* * *

"Man, when will the Patch learn that some of us don't have a lot of money?" Hao groaned as he and Yoh walked down the well-trodden path. "Some Shamans don't even bring money to the fight. I hardly even touch the stuff."

Yoh smiled. "I'm used to shopping. Anna has me do it all the time." He poked into the bags. "But you're a cruel big brother, Hao. No oranges!"

"Here you go!" The brothers looked up to see a girl with long, purple hair that was bright green at the tips. Her eyes were a bright jade green, and a dragon tattoo that started on her cheek, wound down her neck, and ended at her upper arm, the wings spreading out across her shoulder blade. She wore a tight, light purple Chinese dress and big black combat boots. A gun was strapped to her hip, and a smile was painted across her red lips. An orange rested in her hand.

"Funga Fu Fu!" Yoh grabbed it. "Thank-you!"

The girl smiled, but it faltered. Suddenly, she began to fall.

Hao gasped. "Whoa!" He handed the bags to Yoh, and caught the girl.

The two boys looked at each other. "We have a new tenant." Yoh murmured. "We'll take her to Faust."

* * *

The girl rested on a mat as Faust looked her over, checking her blood pressure and heartbeat.

"Her breathing is normal, her blood pressure is good...I'd say that she suffered from a sudden shock."

Anna had pulled the twins over for questioning. "Run that by me again...you were walking down the path when this girl appeared in front of you and handed you an orange?" Anna inquired.

Hao nodded. "It's the absolute truth. Yoh, you still have the orange, right?"

Yoh grinned. "I ate it."

Both Anna and Hao groaned. "What are we going to do with you?"

Suddenly, there was a gasp. Everyone turned to see Sagittarius pointing at the girl laying down on the mat.

Ren raised an eyebrow. "Yes?"

Sagittarius gulped. "Th-that girl's been accused many times of being a Mary Sue!"

At the sound of "Mary Sue", the girl jumped up and ran over to Sagittarius.

"How _dare _you call me the name of such a foul, evil creature!" She screamed, poking him in the chest. Sagittarius frowned. "Well, it's true! I only stated the facts!"

The two ranted and fought until Chocolove raised his hand. "Um...who are you?"

The girl turned, totally ignoring Sagittarius. "I am Jade Amber-Skye. I am a member of the Mary Sue Hunter Branch HQ." She took out her badge from nowhere and showed it to him.

Ren hummed in thought. "If you were accused of being a Mary Sue, then why are you a hunter?"

As soon as Jade turned to Ren, her pupils dilated and she swayed from side to side. "Wow...you're really hot."

Ren's eyes got wide, on the other hand, and he scrambled onto the railing. "Keep away from me! I'm armed!"

Jade shook her head and got a glass of water, once again, from nowhere. "It's okay. Just whenever I come within five feet of a really attractive guy, I get dizzy and faint. It's part of this curse." She pointed to the tattoo on her arm and shoulder. "It runs in the family."

"How would your family populate if the members kept fainting in front of someone really attractive?" Anna mused.

"I WASN'T TALKING TO YOU!!" Jade screamed. Everyone jumped back.

"Tell us about you." Yoh asked quietly from his corner.

Jade finished her water. "People were always jealous of my family for our immense beauty. One day, thousands of years ago, an old woman placed a curse on my family so that they would be overcome with dizzy spells and faint whenever he or she came in five feet of someone attractive. Because of this, we have been forced to marry incredibly ugly people." She shuddered and sat down. "A group of people accused my mother, twin sister and myself of being Mary....Mary Sues." She shivered again. "They attacked my home and killed my parents. I was forced to live in a horrible foster home where I was never allowed to watch my favorite TV program, and I had to do all my chores and homework!" She sniffed. "But this only made me stronger. I decided to become a Hunter so I could rid the world of Sues and my family would never be mistaken for one again. I also vowed to break my family curse and marry someone incredibly attractive."

Hao locked eyes with Sagittarius. _She's definitely a Sue._

Jade continued. "I saw you two-" She pointed to Hao and Yoh- "And I wondered if my family was like that, long ago. It broke my heart to hear the younger brother complain that his older brother didn't buy any oranges, so I gave him one." She sighed. "But the curse ran its course, and I fainted in front of their feet. I'm so sorry!" She hung her head, but it snapped up. "But it's very lucky of me to find a houseful of good-looking guys! The only trouble is to choose which one to marry!"

Anna pulled out her 1080 beads and wrapped them around Yoh.

"Hey, aren't these for Hao?" The confused brunette questioned.

"You're _my _fiancee." Anna said strictly.

Jade huffed over at Anna and Yoh. "Well, there are still plenty of good-looking guys for me to choose from!"

Sagittarius frowned. "Uh, the only guys here eligible for marriage are me and Chocolove. So, who are you talking about?"

Jade looked around at the (nearly) empty room.

"I'll get them! No one escapes me alive!" She ran out of the room through an unseen door.

Sagittarius sighed. "Whatever." That's when his pager rang.

He looked up at Anna. "Sorry, I gotta take this." He pressed a button. "Talk to me."

His face paled. "You're kidding me! They just left! I'll see you later, then." He put the pager away and picked up his gun. "Chocolove, we gotta fly!"

* * *

Ren threw himself at the tree and started climbing.

"Hey, Ren!" Ren looked down at Lyserg waving to him. He slid down to the lowest branch.

"Last time I saw you with that expression, you were running from Nishayako and Ananara. Is there another Sue already?" The British dowser looked worried.

"Yeah, but I'm not too worried." Horo came up behind them.

"Why? Because you're not attractive?" Ren retorted.

"No! Because she faints when she comes within five feet of a hot guy." Horo snapped back.

"And what makes you think you're in that category?" Ren started climbing again.

"You-you-you're all whatever!" Horo huffed, crossing his arms.

Lyserg shrugged and started climbing the tree with Ren.

Far off in the distance, they heard a motorcycle.

"Mary Sues on a motorcycle? What next?" Ren asked from his branch.

The motorcycle stopped at the tree. Sitting on it were two guys.

One had brown-reddish hair, the other had black hair, and they both had weapons on their waists.

"Are you guys being chased by a Mary Sue?" The brunette asked.

Ren started climbing down. "Yes, we are. Who are you?" Lyserg and Horo followed him.

The brunette got off the motorcycle and took out a badge. "I'm part of the Mary Sue Hunters. My name is Rekkord. This is my partner, Enos." Rekkord's dull green eyes glimmered.

Enos walked up to Ren and held out his hand. "Pleased to meet you." His eyes were very strange. One was very dark.

The other was very light.

Horo inspected Enos' eyes a little. "What's up with your eyes?"

Enos chuckled and put a hand over his right eye. "I'm blind in this eye. It's a long story, and we need to get going." He looked up at the sky, which was darkening. "It looks like a storm."

* * *

But we need to leave our small group and move to Jade. After all, she is the main character in this filler.

Walking down the path, her eyes scanned the area. "They can't hide from me. They feel too bad for me."

Thunder rumbled in the distance. Angry green eyes flashing, Jade whirled around. "STOP INTERRUPTING MY MONOLOGUE!"

* * *

While Jade rants about Mother Nature interrupting her speeches (which should really be interrupted more often, Mary Sues defy Mother Nature), Hao begs Mother Nature to let him live.

"Please don't find me..." The fire shaman was even more Sue-phobic than everyone. Maybe it was because Sues made up into down, turned gravity into gravy, and made canon into OOC, we will never know.

Hiding behind a rock, Hao felt a raindrop hit his forehead. "Wonderful."

"Hao!" Sagittarius ran into the small clearing and threw himself over the rock his friend was hiding behind. "Jade's coming. My friend's going to arrest her."

Hao got up. "Thank goodness. Oh, bless the Sue Hunters."

The rain had picked up considerably as Ren and the small group got into the clearing. "Jade is right behind us." Lyserg panted, "So be care-"

"Thanks for waiting." Coming out from a nearby tree, Jade appeared. Lightning flashed around her, illuminating her presence. Her hair dripped with rain, making it look like she cried eternal tears.

Raising her gun, she aimed it at the group. "Die."

She shot it, scattering everyone. "Hold it! What did we do to you?" Horo asked, holding up his hands.

"You added to the wounds! I never knew my family! Hao, I had a twin sister! You, out of all people should understand what that's like! Lyserg, I lost my family at a young age! You should understand! The world hates me! They never understand!" She continued to fire.

Finally, Rekkord stood up. "Jade Amber-Skye, you are under arrest for being a Mary Sue and disrupting the piece." He showed her his badge. "Accept your trial quietly."

Jade lost it. "Why does everyone think I'm a Mary Sue? For the last time, I AM NOT A MARY SUE!"

Suddenly, the tree behind her was struck by lightning and caught fire. Hao's eye glimmered.

"Did you hear me?" Jade lowered her gun. "I. Am. Not. A. Mary. SUE!!"

The tree behind her started falling. It found its target on Jade, and crashed on her. With her dying breaths, she continued to curse the world and proclaim she was not a Sue as the tree crushed and burned her. But as Jade died, the rain started slowing down, and the sky cleared.

"Well that was climactic." Lyserg commented, wringing out his hair. "So, why did you decide to pass a trial now?"

Rekkord shook out his hair. "We have new evidence. Come on, our boss wants to see you."

Ren was curious. "Why? For questioning?"

Enos shook his head. "No she just wants to meet you. And she thinks its only fair that you get to see Tenshi's trial, seeing as its going to be passed this weekend."

* * *

Rose: Slight cliffhanger!

Lyserg: I hope we met your expectations, JayJayChan.

Hao: Reviews kill the Sues!

Lyserg: We don't need to remind them every single chapter...

Hao: Who asked you?!

Rose: (sighs)


	13. Crossed City and the Branch HQ

Rose: Hey guys!

Enos: Where are the Shaman King guys?

Rose: Well, I figured that, because this chapter has to do with the Sue Hunters mostly, I'd let you introduce it with Tricki!

Tricki: And here I am! Sue Death Toll count: 31 Sues down.

Enos: Disclaimer: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King or any of the animes/mangas she mentions here. She does, however, own a secret fanart stash that Rekkord and Sagittarius are looking for.

Rose: WHAT? Those jerks! (goes looking for them) ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

"Your boss is wonderful. She should get an award or something." Ren said loudly. He joined Sagittarius on his motorcycle with Horo. (Rose: Up to three people can fit on a motorcycle at once.)

"What's her name?" Lyserg asked, sitting with Rekkord and Enos.

Enos shook his head. "We're not supposed to reveal it. She goes by a different name to hide her identity from the Sues, and sometimes she changes names. Once in a while she'll throw us for a loop and dye her hair." He snickered at Lyserg's stunned face. "Nah, she doesn't really."

Rekkord slipped on a pair of goggles. "She did cut her hair once to disguise herself."

Yoh sat with Hao on the S.o.F, as all the other bikes were full. "Hao, do you still remember how to get there?" Sagittarius shouted up at his friend.

"Uhhh...no, I don't. But all I have to do is follow you guys, right?" The pyro laughed nervously.

"Actually, it would help more if you remembered it." A voice said suddenly. Everyone turned to see a blonde teen sitting on another motorcycle. His hair was a pale blonde, his eyes a chocolate brown.

"Tricki!" Hao and Yoh both chorused.

"Great! Now Chocolove can come with us!" Enos cheered. Chocolove hopped on Tricki's motorcycle with him.

"So, how are we going to get Tenshi to come with us?" Horo asked as Sagittarius started up the motorcycle.

"Two ways. First, Tenshi goes where you guys go. If that doesn't work, then our boss summons her." Tricki called.

"And where are we going, exactly?" Ren asked.

The Sue Hunters and Hao all smiled. "Crossed City, in Riverlark county. In our world, Athena!" Enos said, with a wide smile accompanying his sentence.

"Another world? I didn't sign up for this!" Horo spazzed. Lyserg just laughed.

"That sounds fantastic!" But Lyserg's words were swallowed in the roars of the engines.

"Hold on tight and don't open you eyes until I tell you to!" Rekkord called. Lyserg squeezed his eyes closed with everyone else.

"Hao, just follow us! Sagittarius will give you the cue!" Tricki shouted.

These last instructions might have sounded strange, but Hao nodded.

"Next stop..." Sagittarius pressed on the gas. "...the Mary-Sue Hunters Branch HQ, in Crossed City!"

* * *

"Lyserg....Lyserg, you can open your eyes now. We're here." Slowly, Lyserg opened his eyes as the motorcycles roared.

"Where...where are we?" Enos smiled at him.

"I would like to welcome you to Crossed City!" Lyserg sat up on the motorcycle and looked at the city around him in awe. The sun was setting, reflecting off the tall buildings. Lights were coming on, and small groups of people dotted the sidewalks. Crossed City was built along a shimmering lake, boats out on the water here and there. (Rose: It's sort of like a mix between Traverse Town from Kingdom Hearts, and Chicago, for those who have been there.)

"It's beautiful." He gasped. On Sagittarius' bike, Horo was laughing and cheering. Ren wasn't even telling him off, just sitting there and staring at the city, like Lyserg.

"Hey!" Above them, Hao called down. "Crossed City sure has changed a lot, hasn't it?"

Sagittarius laughed. "I wouldn't know! I live here!"

"Well, wouldn't you notice the changes, then?" Ren retaliated.

"Just forget it! We're almost there!" Rekkord called out.

* * *

The three bikes pulled up at a building with tall, glass walls. Lyserg still stared.

"This is the Branch HQ? Then where's the Main HQ?" Horo asked.

The hunters shook their heads. "We're not allowed to tell. Crossed City is a sort of bridge between the Sues world and the other worlds. Sues have to pass through here to get to where they're going. What if a Sue lurking around heard our conversation? Then what? She could ambush the Main HQ, and we here at the branch would not receive orders." Enos explained.

"What about your boss?" Ren asked. "Isn't she the one who gives you your orders?"

"Yeah, but she gets her orders from the higher-ups at the Main HQ." said Rekkord. He took a small key card from his pocket and slid it through the door. "Guests first." He opened the door and stepped aside to let the others through.

Lyserg stared. It was like coming into Crossed City all over again.

The Branch HQ had a main glass staircase going up, and one going down. Several rooms to the side and up were sectioned off by frosted glass partitions. People walked across the floor briskly, carrying coffee, papers, or nothing at all. Some had guns like Sagittarius and Tricki.

Everyone stood staring until Rekkord walked in front. "Welcome to the Mary Sue Hunters Branch HQ! We're pretty busy here, so Enos and myself will bring you up to meet the boss. Follow us!" He started walking up the stairs, with the group following him. Tricki and Sagittarius had gone somewhere else.

"It feels like I'm on a tour." Yoh whispered to Ren.

Ren huffed. "It may feel that way to you, but not me." He held his head high.

"Stop!" Rekkord held out a hand, stopping Hao abruptly, causing the whole line to stop, and everyone behind Hao to bump into the person in front of them.

Enos chuckled. "This is our boss's room. Please be quiet going in." He opened the door, and the group filed in. Enos was about to follow when he bumped into a girl with red hair, carrying a stack of papers.

He gasped and his face reddened. "N-Nadia! Hi!" Enos nervously twisted a thick, silver, Gothic ring on his finger. "How are you?"

The girl, Nadia, smiled. "I'm good! Looks like we have some visitors." She peered at Yoh & Co. "Welcome to the Branch HQ!" Nadia waved and went down the stairs.

Enos sighed happily. Horo and Chocolove both chuckled a little, but yelped in pain as Ren stepped back onto both of their feet.

Rekkord smiled at his partner as he entered the office with everyone else and shut the door.

That was when everyone brought their attention to the girl sitting at the desk. She wore round glasses, had brown hair tied up in a low ponytail, and dull green eyes. Her nose was buried in book 5 of FullMetal Alchemist, a pair of black heaphones over her ears, a plushie of Aidou Hanabusa clutched in one arm, and a box of pocky sitting in front of her. She looked to be about fourteen or fifteen years old.

That's why the Shaman King boys gawked at her.

"She's...so young!" Lyserg gasped.

Her eyes shot up. Slowly, she took off the headphones, which were blasting the Death Note soundtrack, put down both the plushie and the book, and stared at Lyserg with steely eyes.

"Well, I'm sorry that I'm less than you expected. But how about you keep your mouth shut when your boss is only eleven years old?" She said this all with dead-on precision.

Lyserg gulped. "I-I....sorry." He backed away into the group.

She smiled and sat back down. "Good. My name is Sori. But that's just what everyone calls me. It's not my real name." Sori held out the box of pocky to everyone. "Anyone want a piece?"

Lyserg took one rather hesitantly, Yoh took two.

Sori waited until everyone who wanted one got one, then took one of her own. "Yes, I am the boss here at the Branch HQ. This isn't a trick. Any questions, comments, concerns?"

Ren raised a hand. "I have quite a few. First off, how do you pass a trial? Second, why are you the boss here, and third: why does everyone else work here?"

Sori nodded. "Yes, of course. See that building over there?" She pointed over to a building across the way from a window behind her. "That's Crossed Incorporation. We rent out two of the four elevators there. We send the suspected Mary Sues into the elevators, and pass their trials going floor by floor. If they are found innocent, the elevator lets them off at the top floor, and they are allowed to leave. But if they are found guilty, the elevator stops at the top floor, opens up to a Sue Hunter, and-bam!" Sori chewed on her pocky. "No more Sue."

Chocolove swallowed. Lyserg paled.

"Why am I the boss here at the branch? I decided that we needed a branch HQ, and asked the high boss about it. She said it was okay, and let me be in control when it was finished. And yes, there is a reason why women are in control here: It's because we got tired of the Sues long before the guys did." Sori answered before Hao could ask.

"I can answer why some of the hunters are here. It's because a lot of them lost family to the Sues." said Rekkord. "Enos here lost an eye trying to protect a girl being attacked by a Sue. That girl was Nadia." He chuckled at Enos' red face and at the stunned looks of the others. "I'm here because my family has three hundred years of Sue-hunting in it. It's tradition." Rekkord puffed out his chest.

Hao jabbed him in the stomach, winding him. "Don't be so proud."

Suddenly, there was a big commotion from outside. Nadia poked her head through the door. "A Raven ChrystalStar from Kingdom Hearts is here to see you." She said timidly. Sori's eyes narrowed.

"I thought I sent her to trial already. Ah, well. Send her in." Sori waved a hand.

Nadia nodded and retreated. Sori turned to the boys. "You'd better scram until I give the all clear." Rekkord and Enos nodded, and ushered everyone out.

"What's going on?" Yoh whispered as they were rushed over by the staircase.

Enos picked up a quiver of arrows and a bow. "A suspected Mary Sue missed her trial and received a bunch of warnings. Now she's mad."

Rekkord attached a sword to his waist. "Get ready for an explosion."

The doors opened to a girl with long, sparkly, dark purple hair and ebony eyes. She wore a tight, dark purple shirt, a black leather jacket, and tight, dark blue jeans. Her black, high-heeled boots clicked across the polished tile floor. A KeyBlade was in each of her hands.

All eyes were on her as she ascended the stairs up to Sori's office. She opened the door and stepped through. The whole branch HQ was silent.

Suddenly, there was a loud screech. "You don't tell me what to do!" A crash, and the Mary Sue suspect stomped out of Sori's office, her eyes on fire.

Noticing all the eyes on her, she whirled around. "Oh, so now you're all mad because I ticked off your boss? Well, good! Because that good-for-nothing, stupid girl has no power! She may control this little branch, but one day, I will have the power! You will all wake up to find me as your new boss, M-" There was a loud BANG from behind her.

She stopped talking. Probably because she had a Hunter's bullet in her head.

Everyone looked up to see Sori holding a gun in her hand, looking enraged. Once the chatter had subsided and the Hunters had cleaned up the black crap, Sori sat down and put the gun away.

"Well, now that things have quieted down, I'll send you guys over to Crossed Incorporation to see Tenshi's trial. She should be there shortly."

Ren hurried behind Sori and gave her a bone-crushing hug. "You're absolutely wonderful. Bless you."

Sori turned bright red. "It's my job, Ren."

"She doesn't get paid for it." Everyone turned to see Tricki and Rekkord standing in the doorway.

"Hey guys, what's up?" Sori sat back in her chair.

"Well, we've confirmed that Tenshi's on her way to the Crossed Incorporation building right now. Should we go?"

Sori nodded. "Absolutely. Leave as soon as possible."

"I think we're ready to go now." Lyserg observed. "Shall we go?"

Ren picked up his sword and put it away. "I'm ready."

Hao took a piece of pocky from the box on Sori's desk. "I'm all set. Let's go."

As they all left, Sori looked into the box. "Hao! That was my last piece!"

* * *

Rose: Ahaha, isn't Sori wonderful?

Tricki: Well..she's my boss, so I really can't give an unbiased opinion...

Enos: She's cool.

Rose: Someone asked me about their full names, so here they are:

Rekkord Kale

Tricki Dellatoni

Enos Tretsky

Sagittarius Runo

Nadia Springs

Rose: ...And there you go! Thanks for reading!

Enos: Please review to kill the Sues.

Tricki: It makes our job much easier.

All: Bye!


	14. An Elevating Adventure

Rose: This is a bit of a depressing note, but the end of the fic is nearing.

Horo: Gasp! How could it be?

Ren: Because we're nearing the end in the rough draft.

Rose: Sue Death Toll Count: 34. There's also a hint of Kingdom Hearts here-twice. If you spot them first, you get virtual cookies!

Horo: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. However, she does own a few pictures of Sora from Kingdom Hearts.

Ren: Why the sudden interest? What happened to me?

Rose: Good question. Sudden spell of wanting to read Kingdom Hearts Mary Sue bashing fics. ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

The small group started walking to the Crossed Incorporation when they bumped into a girl with short, dirty blonde hair and green eyes.

"Yo, Tobi! What's up?" Rekkord raised his hand in greeting.

The girl (Tobi) smiled. "The bounty on the head of Tenshi Sazano Lila Autumn GlitterBlossom. A bunch of fans are complaining that she's messing up the fandom, and there's a price of..." She held out a piece of paper to everyone. Chocolove took it, and everyone gathered around to see.

"TH-THAT'S A LOT OF ZEROES!" Could be heard echoing everywhere in Crossed City.

Tobi nodded. "Some people are even sending out their own Sues to stop her. That means there will be a sudden influx of Sues in the Shaman King world, not to mention mixed with the usual flow. She's on her way over right now, I just checked. Rekkord, I suggest you get your butt in gear and pass Tenshi's trial, pronto." She narrowed her eyes.

Rekkord patted her on the head. "Hey, don't worry, Tobi. I got it all under control."

Tobi blushed. "W-well, keep it under control! I'll see you later." She walked briskly past the group to the Branch HQ Building.

Rekkord blushed, too. Enos smiled. _We're in the same boat now._

* * *

"Ooh, shiny." Horo held his finger out to a small computer on a desk.

Ren slapped his hand away. "Don't touch!" They were all inside the Crossed Incorporation building. Rekkord and Enos were clearing up some last-minute procedures with the front desk people. Chocolove was messing around with his reflection in the glass walls. Lyserg was standing over by the front desk, listening to everything that Rekkord and Enos were saying. Yoh was dozing by the front door, Hao nudging him awake every now and then.

"Okay guys, we're in the clear." Rekkord said, coming into the center of the room. "Everyone gather around." The group clustered together to listen to his mini-speech.

"We're going into a special room where she can't see us, but we can see her." Rekkord explained.

"It's the Security Room." Said Enos bluntly. "We'll be able to talk to her, but she can't get at you guys. Please don't screw around with any of the equipment, you could break it. Any questions?"

There was silence from the group. "Okay, then we're all set. Just follow us and try not to get lost." Rekkord said.

* * *

Seated in the Security Room, Lyserg kept his eyes glued on the screen.

"Lyserg? Hellooo?" Rekkord waved a hand in Lyserg's face.

"Huh?" The greenette snapped out of it. "Oh, sorry. What?"

Rekkord sighed. "Is everything okay? You looked kind of...lost there."

Lyserg nodded. "Yeah, I'm okay. I'm just excited. This'll be my first Mary Sue trial."

Horo joined the others after getting some water. "When's the trial gonna start? I'm hungry."

"In a moment, keep your shirt on." Said Hao.

"You need to learn that." Lyserg replied to Hao.

"Touche." Was the pyros' reply. He played with a flame on the end of his fingers.

"Guys, guys. Shh. She's coming." Chocolove pointed at the screen and everyone was quiet as Tenshi began to approach the elevator. Someone had taped a piece of paper that read: "bishies here" on the door.

"Come on, guys! She's not that stupid!" Hissed Horo.

Ren raised an eyebrow. "How stupid is she, then?"

Enos held his hand up to silence them as Tenshi pressed a button on the elevator and bounced inside, a trail of sparkles and petals following her.

"And here we go." Rekkord brought up a stack of papers and switched to the elevator camera.

Tenshi was happily humming in the elevator when a speaker above her whined. She whirled around. "Who's there?"

Rekkord cleared his throat. "Tenshi Sazano Lila Autumn GlitterBlossom, you are under arrest for disrupting the Shaman King universe and harassing the characters there."

She gasped. "But how could that be? I'm too perfect to be arrested!"

"And that's the problem. You don't have any flaws, and flaws are what make a person truly perfect. Sure, some of us aren't perfect. Most people out there aren't. But that's what makes us human. So what does that make you? A monster." Enos replied.

"You've been reading a lot, haven't you?" Whispered Rekkord, moving his mike away so Tenshi couldn't hear them.

"Maybe." Was the smart-aleck reply.

"Tenshi." The Mary Sue looked up from filing her nails at the camera. "Yes?"

"There is still a chance that we find you innocent. If you be patient as we pass your trial, we'll see what we can do." Rekkord took a file out of a blue backpack that no one saw him bring in. Enos pressed a button and the elevator started going up.

"Evidence one: First appearance. You said that your parents had died when you were a baby, left you with a large amount of spirits to control, and...that's it." Rekkord blinked. _Honestly, I was exepecting more of an angst bucket, cry-your-eyes-out-past._

Tenshi rolled her eyes. "Whatever."

"You go on to explain the future as it would be if you controlled it. Only Hao can see the future with Reishi, and you do not have Reishi. Besides, where does your romance with any of the characters fall into the original story line? At least some fanfictions keep to the story line a little bit." Enos explained, reading what he could over Rekkord's shoulder.

"At the end of your life story, you say that you will be overcome with guilt at cheating on Ren with Lyserg and throw yourself into the ocean and die, making everyone sad. First, Lyserg would never fall in love with someone who loves Hao. All fans know that." Rekkord said, shifting the papers.

"So then why are there so many LysergxHao fanfics?" Tenshi half screamed, half whispered as the elevator got off the lobby and arrived at floor one.

Lyserg blushed bright red, making himself look like a Christmas tree. Hao paled.

"Those are the creations of the imagination." Enos drawled, ignoring his companions reactions. "That could never happen in the real story line, thus further tearing the fanfic away from the actual story line. And second, saying that you would throw yourself in the ocean and die contradicts what happens next: Ren stabs you in the stomach with his Kwan Dao. You don't die, and there's no blood."

"There's no scar, either! Want to see?" Tenshi reached for the hem of her shirt.

"Ack! No!" Screamed Enos, bolting away from the screen. Ren spit out his water, and Yoh fell backwards.

"Uhhh...moving right along." Rekkord was pale as he flipped through the pages of the report. "Evidence two: Second appearance. Annoying Ren to no end." The elevator climbed to the second floor.

* * *

The rest of the trial went something along the lines of this: Rekkord stated some evidence with Enos pitching in, and Tenshi would retaliate.

Finally, Rekkord tapped the microphone, making everyone in the security room wake up or jump at the sudden whine.

"Based on the evidence, we at the Mary Sue Hunters Branch HQ have decided that you, Tenshi Sazano Lila Autumn GlitterBlossom..."

Everyone was silent. You could've heard a pin drop. No one was breathing. No one was moving.

Until Hao spoke up. "Oh, come on, Rekkord! Just get to the verdict already!"

Rekkord frowned. "Gimme a break! My love of the dramatic pause restricts me from continuing!"

Hao sat down with a huff. "Well then, I need to learn to love the dramatic pause."

Rekkord sighed. "The Hunters have decided that you are guilty of Mary Sue activities, and this trial is over. A Hunter will be waiting for you at the top floor."

Tenshi growled prettily. "No! This isn't happening! This can't be...I DEMAND you let me go!"

Enos smirked. "No can do, missy. Like he said, the elevator will stop at the top floor, open up, and there will be a Hunter waiting for you."

Tenshi whipped out her fans. _If I can get out of here, I can flee to another world. Kingdom Hearts sounds nice. I can flood the Shaman King world with so many Sues that they'll _have _to focus there instead of on me! It's the perfect plan. Well, what did I expect? I'm the perfect girl, thank-you very much. _

Enos was getting worried. Tenshi was mad, and when a Sue gets mad...it ain't pretty, let me tell you.

"Why doesn't anyone love me?" She screamed. "No one trusts me!"

Rekkord noticed the signs, too. "Fingers in your ears, everyone!" He pressed his hands over his ears as Tenshi began to change. Her hair became shorter, cut messily and greasy. It turned dark and straggly. Her eyes went from dazzling purple to a muddy greenish-brown. Her clothes started changing colors until they clashed. Her face went from delicate and finely tanned to an uneven tan and greasy. The two fans in her hands had turned into two bloody axes.

She was no longer a Mary Sue. She was a _Monster Sue._

With a roar, she charged at the camera and slashed it, opening a teleportation portal from the elevator to the teleport pods.

Shuddering, Enos pulled out his pager and pressed a button. "Hey, Tobi? It's me. Tenshi's become a Monster Sue, and she's off to do something evil. Can you tell Miss Sori that we'll be at the HQ later? Thanks." He hung up and turned to the group. "Guys, this is the final battle. Tenshi's gone off to the teleport pods to flood your world with Mary Sues so she can escape to another world. We'll need your help for this. Are you in?"

Ren nodded. "I'm in. It's time for my revenge against that annoying brat."

Hao nodded. "Me too. I never back away from a good fight."

Lyserg stepped in. "Of course."

Horo scratched his head. "I don't get it. How did you figure out her plans?"

Enos shrugged. "It's what most Sues do when they're escaping trial. Remember Kiri? She's originally from the Kingdom Hearts world."

Rekkord picked up his sword. "But we got this one in the bag. Let's go, guys!"

"Right!"

* * *

Rose: (yawns) I'm tired...

Ren: Good for you.

Horo: We only have about...(counts on rough draft) four more chapters, guys!

Rose: So get those reviews in...

Horo: And have a nice day!

Ren: HAVE A NICE DAY?!


	15. Last Chance Escape, part 1

Rose: Hi guys!

Yoh: Hi!

Hao: Can we please get to the point?

Rose: Sure, sure. Sue Death Toll Count: 38 Sues Down!

Yoh: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. She does, however, own a small stash of Rolan fanart. (Rolan is from MAR)

Hao: Ren's probably losing his mind right now because you switched.

Rose: Ah, let him lose it. ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

While the small group was packing up to go hunt Tenshi, Tricki was busily printing out reports on the Sues coming in and out of the worlds. Being the youngest of the Sue Hunters (albeit the most experienced next to Rekkord and Tobi), Tricki was not often in battle. He had taken to fetching reports, working with computers and fixing weapons. In truth, it was something Tricki didn't really mind.

But he got the scare of his life when he picked up the report for Sori on the Sue status that day.

As the printer spit out the report, Tricki picked it up and gave it a once-over. His eyes got wide. He turned pale.

"MISS SORIII!!" Said boss of the Branch HQ looked up from D-Gray Man volume two.

"Yes, Tricki?" She addressed the panting young Sue Hunter leaning up against the door frame.

"Th-these reports state that there are at least thirty more Sues going into the Shaman King world, and that a girl by the name of Miyuumi Bliss PearlBlossom is going into the Kingdom Hearts world." Tricki regained composure. "But the strange thing is that Tenshi isn't part of any of these Sues going in or out!"

Sori took the report and also gave it a once-over. She stared at Miyuumis' name.

"Blossom," She whispered. "No, Tricki. She's still there. Get me on the line with Rekkord."

* * *

As the others were heading out to the teleportation pods, Rekkords' pager beeped. He picked it up and flipped it open. "Hello?"

There was some quiet talking on the other side. "Uh-huh. Gotcha. I understand. Yup. Okay, we're going right now. Bye." He pressed a button. "I have some news for you guys."

Lyserg raised an eyebrow. "Good news or bad?"

Enos smiled. "There is only news, never good or bad."

Rekkord glanced over at his friend before beginning. "There are at least thirty more Sues going into your world, and Tenshi has changed her name and appearance."

Enos swallowed. "That is bad news."

Chocolove looked pale. "Well, do we know who she is and what she looks like now?"

Rekkord nodded. "Our boss believes that she now goes by Miyuumi Bliss PearlBlossom, and that she's headed for the Kingdom Hearts world. Which means that we need to get going now." He sprinted off to the teleport pods as fast as he could go, the rest of the group hot on his heels.

* * *

The teleport pod building was like the rest of the city: high tech and sophisticated. However, the lights were knocked out, papers were scattered everywhere, and the doors were hanging off their hinges. It was mostly empty, except for a very scared technician.

"Everyone when they saw her, I just hid and tried to stay that way. I h-had a feeling that you'd come soon, so I left the doors unlocked." He covered his head.

Enos nodded in understanding. "You're a good man. Go home, drink something hot, and take a nap. Leave the rest to us."

The technician nodded and scampered off.

Rekkord picked up the phone. "Just as I figured; she cut off all the phone lines."

Ren rolled his eyes. "Well thanks for the report, Captain Obvious."

Enos snickered. Rekkord frowned. "Let's keep walking."

* * *

The small group started walking down a dimly lit hallway littered with trash.

"Man, I feel bad for the janitor! Having to clean all this up..." Horo muttered, kicking away an empty latte cup.

"Hey! That was mine!" Everyone looked up to see a girl standing in the hallway holding another latte cup. She had long, dark pink hair with silver streaks in it and shining green eyes. She wore a long, black satin dress and white sandals. A sword was strapped to her waist.

"It's not nice to kick other people's trash!" She walked over and picked it up.

Hao inched behind Rekkord. "Are you...Tenshi?"

The girl frowned. "No....but I was. I am now Miyuumi Bliss PearlBlossom." She pointed at the group. "And I WILL escape!"

Ren rolled his eyes and grabbed his sword. "Can you be any stupider?"

Miyuumi pulled out her own sword. "I'm not afraid to fight you now, Ren-kun! I'm going to the Kingdom Hearts world."

Yoh sighed. "You shouldn't call Ren by that name, either..."

Ren charged first at Miyuumi and their swords clashed. Miyuumi uttered some chants and sent Ren flying into the opposite wall.

"Ouch..." The Chinese Shaman picked some crumbling rubble off his shoulder.

Miyuumi giggled. "I've got some new attacks. Don't wanna be a one-trick pony when I go to Destiny Islands!"

Rekkord pulled out his sword. "You're not going to Destiny Islands on my watch!"

Miyuumi laughed. "Let's just see about that!"

Enos pulled out his gun. "Yeah, we will!" He fired, and Miyuumi scattered.

She let out a loud, sneering chuckle. "You can't beat me! I'll escape to the KH world and hide there...and all of you will be dust in the wind! Poof!" She cackled.

Hao sighed. "Evildoers don't announce their plans. If you really want to escape, don't tell anyone."

Miyuumi's ears perked up. "Oh yeah?! Well you're-" She stopped as her sword began to glow.

Everyone stepped back as the sword grew and took a new shape. When the glow died, Miyuumi was holding a dark purple KeyBlade covered with sparkles and sequins.

"A KEYBLADE?! Come on! Get more original, people!" Screeched Enos.

Miyuumi ignored him and squealed. "It's beautiful! I love it!"

Here, Lyserg saw his opening. He fired his pendulum at Miyuumi.

But just because she was distracted for a bit didn't mean that Miyuumi had let down her guard. She saw Lyserg's pendulum coming at her and raised her KeyBlade to block it.

_There's my opening! _Lyserg maneuvered his weapon so it wrapped around the KeyBlade.

"Oh, come on! That is so not fair!" Miyuumi screamed. Lyserg started winding his pendulum so he was headed straight towards Miyuumi.

But then, something even more amazing happened. Miyuumi's KeyBlade doubled itself.

"Am I lucky or what!" Miyuumi squealed, more of a declaration than a question.

Lyserg's eyes widened as Miyuumi dropped her first KeyBlade and aimed to strike at him with the second.

_My pendulum's still wrapped around the first one...it'll take too long to free it! _The Dowser panicked.

"Lyserg!" Enos raised his gun to shoot at Miyuumi, but Yoh held out his hand to stop him.

"Don't shoot yet. Everything will work out." The brunette said quietly.

Enos raised an eyebrow. _Is there something I'm missing?_

Miyuumi brought her KeyBlade up and swung it down. "Die, Lyserg Diethel!"

Lyserg closed his eyes and waited for the cold metal to hit his throat. When it never came, he opened his eyes.

A silver figure was holding Miyuumi by the collar. Deftly, it flung the Sue into the wall.

Stunned, Lyserg wound his pendulum as the figure walked forward, becoming more clear with each step.

It was easy to tell that the figure was a girl, but not a Mary Sue. She had long, red hair and shiny blue eyes. She wore a simple white dress, and a small scar cut across her cheek.

Rekkord gasped. "You're...I don't believe it..."

The girl smiled. "I'm Keliah Runo, Sagittarius' sister."

* * *

Rose: Ooh, cliffhanger! Mwahahahaa! I'm so evil!

Yoh: I like this one better, though. Not so scary.

Hao: I agree.

Rose: Yeah, I like this chapter. And for those of you who are confused, when I say 'Miyuumi', I mean Tenshi's new form.

Hao: She's still one scary Sue, though.

Yoh: Hope to see you next chapter!

Rose: Reviews kill Sues like Miyuumi!

Hao: We really don't need more of them.

All: Bye!


	16. Last Chance Escape, part 2

Rose: ACHOO!

Hao: Those chocolate M&Ms are making you sick.

Rose: Where's your proof?

Hao: Mmm...good point. Sue Death Toll Count: 39.

Rose: DISCLAIMER- I don't own Shaman King, but I do own...Hao, what do I own?

Hao: An ACen full-weekend pass for this year.

Rose: That works. ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

Lyserg stared at Keliah in shock. "It's...you? You're Keliah?"

She put her hands on her hips. "Well who did you expect, Santa Claus?"

Horo laughed. "Hey, that's a good one!"

Keliah smiled. "Thanks. Tell my brother I said hi and that I miss him."

Yoh nodded. "I'm sure he misses you, too."

Keliah smiled as she started to become brighter and disappear. "Bye guys! Take care of Sagi for me!" She called to the group.

They waved to her. "Bye!"

Miyuumi, meanwhile, lay forgotten and bruised on the floor. "And what am I, chopped liver?"

Chocolove thought about it. "No, but you're the closest thing to it."

This sent everyone into fits of laughter. "It's insane!" Ren chuckled, "Insane! One of Chocolove's jokes is actually funny!"

Miyuumi felt the heat rise in her face. "Never have I been so insulted..." She picked up her KeyBlade and doubled it. Holding one in each hand, she charged at the group.

Rekkord was the first to notice. "Scatter!"

Everyone jumped out of the way in time. Miyuumi kept charging, and hit the wall with an ugly 'thud!', sending bricks and debris flying.

Horo army-crawled his way down another hall. A dimly lit room was the first place Horo sought shelter.

And Ren followed close behind.

"Hey, what are you doing here?" The Ainu hissed, displeased that his fellow Shaman would take his hiding spot.

"You're here to hide. I'm here to protect the teleport pods." Ren stated, "Look around you."

Horo swiveled around and got a good look of the room. Teleport pods in groups of six were lined up against the left and right walls. A screen was up against the north wall with shiny buttons and levers.

"Oh." Was all he could say.

"Exactly." Ren took out his sword. "But this isn't the only one. There are more down the hall. However..." He pressed a couple of buttons and the screen lit up, showing a map of all the worlds.

Ren smirked. "Got it."

* * *

Like Ren said, there were more teleport pod rooms down the hall.

But Enos and Rekkord knew better. The room Ren and Horo were in was the room for anime worlds. The room Miyuumi was aiming for was the game world room.

Where Kingdom Hearts was.

Oh, the HORROR!

"Ren! Horo!" Enos poked his head into the room. The two Shamans turned around so fast that Enos swore he heard their necks crack.

"This is the anime worlds room. Miyuumi will be here soon to fill your world with Sues. There are also tons of Sues coming in from fans wanting Miyuumi gone."

"So what should we do?" Horo asked frantically.

"Cut the Shaman King world off! Put it on lockdown; no one gets in or out!"

Horo looked at the controls. "But how do we do that?"

Enos opened his mouth to explain, instead he let out a shout as Miyuumi swiped at him with her KeyBlade.

Ren sweatdropped. "We'll have to figure it out on our own, then."

* * *

Instead of protecting his own world, Lyserg went straight to the game world, followed by Rekkord.

"If we can cut off the Kingdom Hearts world, then we can stop Miyuumi's master plan. It won't matter if she gets to the anime world room." Rekkord muttered, tapping some buttons.

Lyserg closed the door. "So, how do we cut it off?"

Rekkord started tapping more buttons. "You put a barrier around it and isolate it from other worlds. It's going to be more difficult than the rest because Kingdom Hearts has worlds within it, and it's got a few Final Fantasy characters in it." He stepped away from the controls and walked over to Lyserg.

"Can I see your pendulum? Just for a moment?" The Hunter held out his hand.

Cautiously, Lyserg un-strapped it from his wrist. "Sure. Why?"

Rekkord took it and pulled a screwdriver out of his pocket. "I'm going to turn it into a Sue Hunter weapon." Carefully, he started tinkering with it.

Lyserg's eyes widened. "I didn't know you could do that!"

Rekkord chuckled. "Well, now you do."

* * *

"Y'know, I'm getting a little tired of playing hide-and-go-seek." Miyuumi sighed. "You guys are really childish. I don't have time for this!" She looked around. There was neither hide nor hair of the Shaman King boys or their Hunter friends.

Hiding behind a wall, Hao watched Miyuumi turn towards the anime world room. "That's it." He stood up.

Kneeling next to him, Yoh watched him stand. "What are you doing? Get down!" The younger Shaman hissed.

Hao shook his head. "No. I'm going to overcome my Sue-phobia. It's time to end this."

The pyro stepped out from behind the wall. "Hey! Miyuumi!"

She turned. "What, you?"

"Did a unicorn throw up on your head, or is that your hair?"

From behind the wall, Yoh giggled. "Good one!"

Miyuumi fumed. "You lousy little brat!" She took a step forward and brandished her KeyBlades.

Suddenly, there was a shrill beep.

"You idiot! That's the wrong button!" Ren hissed from the anime world room. He and Horo were busily trying to cut off their world when Horo leaned over and pushed a lever.

"Hey, it was an accident!" Horo whined.

Miyuumi sneered and stepped into the anime world room. "Nice job, boys." With a flick of her wrist, Ren and Horo were pinned to the wall by some tiny, silver and pink snakes.

Ren struggled against his binds. "Horo, this is all your fault!"

Flipping her hair, Miyuumi giggled. "Silly Ren-kun! I would've found you anyway!" She sauntered over to the control panel.

"Now, how does this thing work?" She pressed a big red button in the corner.

Flood the Shaman King world? Yes or No

Miyuumi clapped. "Yay, I found it! Miyuumi is a good girl!"

Disturbed by Miyuumi suddenly going perky and speaking in third person, Ren, Horo, and Hao were utterly speechless.

Miyuumi brought the tiny clicker over to the 'yes'. "Good bye, boys. It's been a blast."

"It _has _been a blast." Miyuumi turned around to see a shadow standing in the doorway.

"No...it can't be..."

Ren smirked. "Lyserg...what took you so long?"

The greenette smiled. "Well, we had to cut off the Kingdom Hearts world first. Then Rekkord wanted to fix my pendulum."

Everyone stared at Lyserg's pendulum. It didn't look like it had been broken.

Miyuumi frowned. "So what if you cut off the Kingdom Hearts world? Look at where we are! We're at the teleport pod station, I can chose any world to escape to!"

Lyserg's smile turned bitter. "I don't think that's going to matter." His pendulum shot out at Miyuumi.

She scoffed. "Oh, please! We've already been through this. Your pendulum isn't strong enough to leave a scratch on me!" She whipped out her KeyBlades and rushed out to meet the attack.

Lyserg maneuvered his pendulum under Miyuumi's KeyBlades and around so it found its target on her back.

Miyuumi stopped. An odd feeling coursed through her. Thoughts filled her head, contradicting her powers and warping her own thoughts. Looking down on her arms, she could see tiny black specks appearing on her skin.

"No...you couldn't have...that's not possible!" She gasped as the specks multiplied and grew larger.

"Yes. Did you know it's possible to turn any weapon into an anti Sue weapon?" Lyserg asked, tilting his head to one side.

"NOOOO!!" Miyuumi exploded with a huge amount of black crap, which spattered the walls. Lyserg got a full blast of it.

"Yuck." He wiped it off his arms as Ren and Horo were freed from the wall.

Among the cheering, Enos bolted through the group to the control panel. He pressed a few buttons, and the screen went blank.

"Well, the mess is cleared...except for this one." He said, gesturing to the black gunk where Miyuumi and here KeyBlades were. "You guys were great through all this. You acted like professional Hunters."

Horo puffed out his chest. Ren smirked proudly. "Well, that was nothing. You should see what we go through on a day-to-day basis."

Rekkord rolled his eyes. "Yeah, right. Now let's go back to the Branch HQ and party!"

As everyone cheered, Lyserg looked down at Morphine sitting on his pendulum. "What do you think, Morphine?"

She smiled up at him. He smiled back. "Yeah. Tomorrow."

* * *

Hao: What does he mean by 'tomorrow'?

Rose: You'll see next chapter!

Hao: Arrgh! I hate you!

Rose: Whatever. So! We have two chapters left in the story. Please get those reviews in if you haven't already!

Hao: More reviews is always a good thing. Authors need constructive criticism....

Rose: And the Sues need to die!

Both: Please review to kill the Sues!


	17. Lyserg's Surprise

Rose: Thanks for the reviews, guys!

Horo: A lot of you reviewed, so thanks! It killed a lot of Sues!

Ren: Sue Death Toll count: 41 Sues down.

Horo: Rose-Sempai does not own Shaman King. She does, however, own a bottle of soda somewhere in the fridge.

Rose: No, you can't have any. ON WITH LE FIC!

* * *

Everyone was gathered in Sori's small office, Shamans and Sue Hunters alike. Sori was seated at her desk, eying those squished into the room, wondering: _Why the heck is everyone here?_

"First off, I want to say that you all did a great job." Sori began, "You handled the situation like real Hunters, and that impressed me. Second off, I want to know why the heck everyone is in my office!"

Horo snickered. Lyserg swallowed and stepped forward. "Actually, I have a request to make."

Sori and the Iron Maiden Jeanne (Rose: What? I did say everyone was in Sori's office!) both raised their eyebrows. "And that request would be..?"

Lyserg smiled nervously. "I-I would like to become a Sue Hunter, please!" He looked down at his shoes.

Everyone gasped. Sori and the Hunters burst out laughing. "Why? I mean, can you seriously do that?" Chocolove spluttered.

Sori nodded. "Yes, he can. It won't show in the series, but it will in the fandom. Why the sudden change, Lyserg?"

The greenette shifted from foot to foot. "See, um...well, I've been fighting with Hao practically since Tenshi came. I think it would be weird to start fighting against Hao again, and besides..." He broke into a more relaxed smile. "The anti-Sue technology interests me! I think my pendulum would make a good weapon!"

Sori smiled. "Those are better reasons than some I've heard. Alright, I'll allow it, but Sue Hunting is a dangerous job. You'll go through a tough, eight-week training course at our academy, Ground Zero. Are you ready?"

Lyserg smiled. "I think so. Yeah, definitely!"

Jeanne rushed over to Lyserg and hugged him. "Bless you. Fight with all your heart."

Hao actually stepped forward and ruffled his hair. "Who knows, you may actually wind up saving my butt from a Sue in the future!" He laughed.

Yoh walked up to Lyserg and held out his hand. Lyserg shook hands with him. "Hey, come back whenever you can to visit, okay?"

Lyserg nodded. "I will." He took off his Oracle Bell and handed it to Yoh. "Give this to the Patch officials for me. I won't be participating in the Shaman King tournament anymore."

Yoh smiled. "Will do."

* * *

At the teleport pods, Lyserg bid his friends a fond and tearful farewell. Back at the Branch HQ, Rekkord and Enos were waiting for him.

"We'll be taking you to Ground Zero, the academy. I have some business there anyway." Said Rekkord, pulling on his helmet.

"Um...I have a question." Lyserg murmured, sliding onto the motorcycle after Enos.

"Quest." The blacknette smiled.

"Why is the Sue Hunters' academy called 'Ground Zero'?"

Enos and Rekkord both grinned. "Because it's underground!"

* * *

The trio motorcycled over to a large cave at the edge of a lake. "Right now, we're on the border of Tree Bell Town and the old Autumn Village." Rekkord said, taking off his helmet, "Enos is from Tree Bell Town."

Lyserg blinked. "Really? I thought all Sue Hunters were from Crossed City. And what do you mean by the old village?"

Enos sighed. "The Autumn Village was a village built so people could live the old way of life. But there were a lot of problems with money, so they picked up and moved somewhere else." He blushed. "And I moved before I became a Sue Hunter. I live in Crossed City, but some of the Hunters don't."

Rekkord motioned for the others to follow him. "Let's go."

* * *

Ground Zero was...beautiful. Much more of a luxurious castle than an academy for Sue Hunters, Lyserg thought. The carpet was thick and red with a gold design, and white pillars lined the walls. A small fountain was in the middle. People had thrown some coins in the fountain. A plaque by the fountain read _All money in this fountain goes to Sue hunting research. _

_When I graduate, I'll dump all the coins in my pockets into the fountain. _Lyserg thought with a smile.

"So, you'll be spending two months here to train. You'll still use your pendulum and Morphine as your fighting weapon, and- what's up?" Rekkord stopped to look over his shoulder at Lyserg, who was staring at a wall.

"What's up?" The brunette repeated his question and strolled over to Lyserg.

"There's so many pictures here!" Lyserg gasped, "Is this your family?" He motioned to a plaque at the top of the wall that read "The Kale family".

Rekkord grinned. "Yeah, everyone who graduated, at least. Look, there's me!" He pointed to the last picture on the wall, which was of a smiling kid. However, the smile looked a bit forced.

"Ah yes, I remember that picture day. You had a fly under your collar, it was really hot, and you really had to use the bathroom when that picture was taken." Mused Enos.

Rekkord flushed bright red. "Quiet, you!"

Enos just chuckled. "Good times, good times."

Lyserg smiled. He couldn't wait to start classes here.

* * *

Rose: It's done! (falls over)

Horo: No it's not!

Ren: You still have one more chapter.

Rose: Dang it! Oh well, next chapter is going to be fun to write. It's called End Party and Sneak Peek.

Horo: What's the sneak peek?

Rose: You'll see!

Horo: No fair! I bet Ren already knows.

Ren: As long as she's still going through her MAR phase, I'm clueless.

Rose: Yes you are. Bye!


	18. End Party and Sneak Peek

Disclaimer: I do not own Shaman King, only this lovely little completed fic and a Roxas plushie. He says hi! (makes Roxas plushie wave to the audience)

Oh, where are the guys? At the End Party. I should join them. See you in the fic! (disappears)

* * *

Hao scanned the room from his seat at a table. _Where is she? _He could see Lyserg chatting with some kid he didn't know, some girl whose hair looked like it had been attacked by a blender, to be more specific. Chocolove was swapping jokes with Rekkord, Tricki was having an intense conversation with Ren, and Horo was blabbing to Enos, who looked bored out of his mind.

He sighed and poked at his piece of cake with his fork. He had received an invitation (along with Yoh, Anna, Lyserg, Horo, Ren, Chocolove, Tamao, and Pirka) to something called an 'End Party'. It was to celebrate the end of Tenshi Sazano Lila Autumn GlitterBlossom, AKA Miyuumi Bliss PearlBlossom. Speaking of which...

Hao smirked at a table, which was set up near a stage at the far end of the room. The table was white, and it had pictures of Tenshi normally, and some of her as Miyuumi on it. Her ever-multiplying Keyblade was set on it along with her fan blades, and someone had scrawled 'May she rest in pieces' on a slip of paper. Everyone else had written their own comments on it, like:

_Goodbye...and good riddance!-Ren_

_She was kinda cute....but psychotic isn't really my type.-HoroHoro_

_I'm actually a bit glad Tenshi came along. If it wasn't for her, I might not be training to be a Sue Hunter.-Lyserg_

_She didn't think my jokes were funny....-Chocolove_

_I'm glad Hao's not so Sue-phobic anymore.-Yoh_

And Hao had written his own comment, as well:

_DEATH TO THE SUES!-Hao_

Smiling, Hao stabbed his cake and took a bite. "Short and simple. I like it."

* * *

Once everyone had quieted down, Rekkord got up on stage. "I'd like to thank you all for coming...but I can't say that. Someone special invited you here, and she's been monitoring all of you since Tenshi came. She's a Hunter, too, but one of the more special types. So I would like to welcome to the stage, Rose!"

He gestured over to stage left, and a girl strolled onto the stage. She looked to be about fourteen years old, and had short brown hair. She wore glasses, a black t-shirt that read KINGDOM HEARTS, and blue jeans. In one arm, she carried a notebook, and a green backpack was slung over her shoulder.

Hao grinned. _So there she is._

Everyone clapped as she walked up to Rekkord and took the microphone. "Hi guys, like Rekkord said, I'm a Sue Hunter. My name is Rose, but my authoress name is RoseSempai. I'm a special kind of Hunter, one of few called the Writers. We don't kill them directly. See, the job of the Writers is to write Mary Sue parodies in which the Mary Sue is killed. Let me tell you, it's not easy. Sues don't cooperate as much as we'd like them to. So I would like to welcome some very important people up on stage with me, and they are: Bouncefox, Reaper-Lawliet, and Jessy-Fran, AKA JayJay_Chan!"

There were several shrieks from a nearby table, and three girls got up and sprinted over to the stage. They all rushed over to Rose and hugged her. Hao noticed they were all girls.

When the little group broke apart, Rose continued. "These people are the ones who PM'ed me while I was writing. Even though it might only be a little bit, all constructive criticism helps. I would also like to say congratulations to the Shaman King characters who put up with Tenshi until we could pin her down. You guys did a great job."

Horo raised his hand. "Does this mean we come up on stage with you?"

Rose looked shocked. "What, you put up with Tenshi, came all the way here for a party, and you want to come up on stage with us?"

Horo blinked, Ren snickered.

Rose kept talking. "I would also like to welcome up on stage with me the Sue Hunters Katelyn Hart, Matthew Stone, Evan, Snubbles, and their friend Karina Silver!"

There was more cheering and clapping as more people crowded up on stage. Hao recognized one person as being the girl with blender-attacked hair that Lyserg was talking to earlier.

After another small hugging session, Rose picked up her backpack. "I want to congratulate you all on the number of Sues put down. Sagittarius, if you may." Rose gestured to the ceiling.

"Got it." Sagittarius pressed a button on a small remote and a screen slowly dropped down. "The final number of Sues dead is..." Sagittarius pressed another button and the screen lit up. "Forty-two!" Everyone clapped and cheered.

Amidst all the cheering, Rose opened her backpack and took out another notebook. "Seeing as this story did so well, I've decided to make a sequel. It will be a crossover of Kingdom Hearts and Shaman King, and take place six months after this one. Lyserg will have a major role."

Hao snickered at the flushed Diethel. "And Hao will play a minor role." Hao stopped snickering.

Rose opened the notebook. "So, without further ado, I give you a sneak peek of Help From the Experts!"

* * *

Help From the Experts, snippet of chapter one.

"My my, what do we have here?" T.C. O'Dell peered over his partner's shoulder, his dark blue eyes shining under a mess of black hair.

Lyserg frowned. "I really don't like it when you breathe down my neck, T.C." He raised his green eyes to glance at the mess in front of him.

A carpet of glass littered the floor in front of the two Sue Hunters. A broken pedestal had been tipped over, no longer holding up a glass case with a shiny purple Keyblade.

Whose Keyblade was that? It was none other than Miyuumi Bliss PearlBlossom's, AKA Tenshi Sazano Lila Autumn GlitterBlossom. Said weapon had been placed carefully within the walls of the Sue Hunting academy, Ground Zero. Why?

Because the officials thought it would be best if they put the weapon somewhere safe (since they couldn't destroy it), and Ground Zero seemed the best, since it was farthest away from the teleport pods.

WRONG! Last night, the Keyblade had been stolen by a Mary Sue, and Lyserg and T.C. were assigned to the case.

Lyserg sighed. "We need experts to find this thing."

T.C. rolled his eyes. "That's why they assigned us to this case, dork! You come from a family of detectives! Find your inner Sherlock!"

A book came sailing over from the other side of the room and whacked T.C. upside the head. Lyserg chuckled. "Thanks, Miss Bianca."

A woman in her late twenties came over to the two boys, T.C. clutching his head in pain. "It's no problem Lyserg, but you don't have to worry. I've already sent for some experts." She looked at them through misty green eyes. "'Find your inner Sherlock', the nerve!" She shook her head.

Lyserg raised his eyebrow. "Uh, when I said 'experts', I meant some people who actually know about the Keyblade. Does that mean you've sent some of the Kingdom Hearts Writers over?"

Miss Bianca shook her head again. "No. I've sent for the characters of Kingdom Hearts themselves. They should be here tomorrow night."

* * *

I'M DONE! (dances with Roxas plushie)

Thanks to everyone who reviewed. You killed a lot of Sues!

By the way, T.C.'s real name is Timothy Christopher. Miss Bianca is one of the teachers at Ground Zero.

I will see you next fic! Bye! (waves)


	19. Revival of the Sequel

* * *

Hey there, Rose here.

There's been a LOT of confusion concerning my Mary-Sue bashing stories. Mainly, the sequel to A Mary Sue Lands in Patch Village. I'm here to clear it up and set the record straight:

First, I posted the sequel. It was a Kingdom Hearts/Shaman King Crossover fic called "Help From The Experts".

After posting it, I found the original sequel, titled "New Breed, New Generation". Written several months prior to "Help From The Experts", it was to take place 500 years later.

I decided to clear it up by asking that a fellow author, Reaper-Lawliet, continue "Help From The Experts". She said maybe, seeing as she didn't have a very good knowledge of Shaman King.

A few months ago, I decided to trash the sequel altogether and move on. I cleared up the situation in my Death Note Mary-Sue bashing oneshot, "Daily dose of Mary-Sue bashing", deleted "Help From The Experts", and put away the original sequel.

However, those who have read chapter nine of "An Encounter of the Mary-Sue Kind" believe I am reviving the sequel, "New Breed, New Generation".

I am reporting that there is a fifty-fifty chance of it. Other than the fact that I have recently started school again, thus cutting my computer time in half, I have other plans for more Mary-Sue bashing stories, and several other oneshots. Please be patient.

I really do appreciate the fact that you're all being so patient with me. Please bear with me as I battle my way through school and try to satisfy your appetite for Mary-Sue bashing at the same time.

Thank-you all for reviewing. The FINAL COUNT is:

51 Mary-Sues dead.

You're all fantastic. Give yourself a cookie and a hug.

-Rose


End file.
